The Story of Our Lives

No Regrets

I knew exactly why I pulled away from the kiss. I pulled away because I didn't want him to be disappointed. Not just because I had never kissed anyone but mainly because I am a disappointing person. I am dangerously depressed, I have the grades but no motivation for uni. There's nothing special or worthwhile about me. Why would he want to spend time with me, let alone kiss me?

"Damien. Trust me. I absolutely love spending time with you. You've got me under a spell here. You've got to believe me and trust that I'm into you." Adam said with a sad smile and reaching down to hold my hand. I looked up and returned the sad smile to him but looked back down at the ground.

"Why? There's nothing special about me. You could get any guy you wanted." I replied.

"Well, evidently I can't get any guy I wanted because the guy I want refuses to let me kiss him and refuses to see how amazing he is." Adam replied kinda proud of himself. "Damien, listen to me. You are an amazing guy. You have the sweetest heart have great taste in musicals, films and tv shows. Your music taste is impeccable. You're sexy as fuck. You always put everyone before yourself but now it's time to think of yourself for once. Do what you want to do." he said smiling.

I started to tear up when he said this. I just shook my head and wiped my eyes.

"Unless you don't want to be with me or if you don't want me to keep flirting with you then please tell me." Adam said defeated, put his head down and pulled his hand away from mine. I quickly took his hand back and put my other hand under his chin and lifted his head and let his eyes meet mine.

"I do want to be with you. More than you know. I'm just scared of disappointing you. I don't want to screw this up." I said smiling, trying to get him to smile back at me. He did but just looked sad.

"Damien, you could never disappoint me. Please let me help you see yourself the way I see you because you are incredible." Adam said smiling. "Now will you let me kiss you? Please." he begged.

"I mean if you're really desperate to kiss me, I suppose I could grant you that wish." I said trying to lighten the mood. We both started laughing. Adam shuffled closer to me on the blanket and out his hand on my cheek and pulled me closer to him. I took a deep breath. This was happening. I closed my eyes as our faces got closer. My heart started racing.

Once our lips met it was magic. Fireworks whooshed inside my heart. It started beating faster. Adam pulled away from the kiss and sighed. My face dropped.

"You have no idea how much I've wanted to do that." he said beaming.

"Oh really? You can do it again if you like." I said smiling and winking at him. He leaned in and kissed me again. It was amazing. I could feel his hand moving from my cheek to behind my neck and his other hand joining.

"Well don't stop on our account." Elliot said chuckling. Adam reluctantly pulled away from the kiss but kept a hand behind my head.

"We were always routing for you two to get together. You couldn't cut the romantic chemistry between you guys with a knife." Alice said playfully kneeing Adam in the shoulder knocking him slightly.

"I know right. It's about god damn time that I kissed this amazing man right." Adam said and gave my neck a little squeeze. I wriggled and giggled. He leant forward and kissed me on the cheek and held my hands. He whispered in my ear, "don't even think about fighting me. You are amazing." I couldn't help but smile.

"We'll we shall leave you to have fun with your boyfriend. We'll see you in a few days." Alice said suggestively and linked Elliot's arm and walked to their car.

I chuckled awkwardly.

"There's only one thing wrong with what Alice said." I began. Adam looked confused. "We aren't actually boyfriends. Yet. So. Adam Gilbert, will you go out with me and be my boyfriend?" I asked nervously. Adam just waited long enough for me to start to spin myself into a spiral before replying.

He practically jumped out of his skin and tackled me backwards and started kissing me.

"So I'll take that as a yes?" I asked giggling.

"Damien. Of course I will be your boyfriend." he said and kissed me more.

"Easy tiger." I said pulling away. "I need to breathe."

Adam sat up and looked deep into my eyes. "I don't want you to be uncomfortable so I won't make you do anything more than kiss if you don't want. It's all on your terms. I promise. I just got a little over excited and literally jumped on my boyfriend. - -  Oh that was weird to say. But it felt like I should have been calling you that the whole time."

"Thank you Adam. I really appreciate it. But is that okay with you?" I asked. He nodded.

"Of course it is. I can't promise I won't get horny but I won't act on it unless you want to." he said smiling. I kissed him on the cheek.

"Thank you." I said again and pulled him into a hug.

We lay back on the blanket and I snuggle up close to him and watched the sunset together.

"I really enjoy being with you Adam. You make me feel so safe and happy. But I don't want to be a burden on you so if I'm ever too much and you need space, just tell me. And don't just say no to make me feel better. I want you to always be honest with me. Please. Promise me." I said. He looked sad but nodded and smiled.