court of lies | robert's rebellion

the family line

"the horror you have committed does not define you"

281 AC, Oldtown

"Why did you do this?", a voice asked, closed the door after him but stayed there, didn't approach her. "Why now and not before? Why wait this long?"

"Every family needs a monster to protect the others.", she mumbled but it was heard, her hands were on the back of Leyton's chair, and her back was turned to him. "I just wasn't aware of the lengths I could go. But the moment I saw the lengths Corlys can go, I knew what I had to do.", she tilted her head towards him. "I would never forgive myself if something would have happened to him because I hesitated before. Your father is my family, Jacen stopped being a part of it the moment he betrayed him. He was long gone."

"Do you blame yourself?"

"No.", this was clear. "I did what I had to do and I would have done it again and if I knew what I know now, I would have done it ages ago to prevent all the bloodshed. Jacen is a traitor who cuckolded his own cousin and murdered his own brother, he stabbed me to kill, he would have gotten rid of you and Garth too if we weren't swift. Yet, I offered him mercy. He saw his brother one last time, I gave him a painless death -something he did not grant to Claron.", she closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "You can judge me all you want Baelor, call me a monster, think I am no different than him and maybe I am not. But I do not regret it."

"I understand why you did it.", he stood next to her, both watching the dark sky lightened up by stars. "Alerie chose to give you the ring, my father would choose me."

"I know."

"I think she made the right call too. I would never manage to fix any of the problems you fixed.", Baelor admitted with an open heart and Atera turned to look at him with vulnerability in her eyes. "I wasn't that strong. But you were, you always were.", he looked at her too. "You were going to kill yourself, aren't you?"

Atera shifted her eyes back to the sky. "As I said, I would do anything to protect this family."

"I don't think your death would achieve that.", he put a hand on her shoulder. "Your death would break my heart."

Atera smiled faintly. "What am I supposed to answer this with?"

"You are welcome.", Baelor offered her the wine glass he was holding.

*

There was an air of lamentation just before noon when she finally entered her bath -almost boiling, just like she enjoyed though Alea never did. She would think of having a colder bath today since both Bella and Adelaide had been gone from her service and Alea was the only one left but she truly needed to numb her muscles with that stinging sensation and Alea, as usual, understood what she needed.

She rarely used a bath boat or the hammam that was placed on the lower floors of the east wing -inspired by Dornish castles and Rhoynish culture. Atera never enjoyed it though she knew that both Princess Elia and Lady Ashara would favour there, feeling closer to their home.

No, she made Leyton agree to a large circle-shaped marble bath inside the small room in one of her chambers. It was a lot bigger and cleaner than bath boats, and she could spend as much as time she wanted there -though she couldn't remember the last time she used it until now.

The bath water had been filled with flowery oils that turned its colour to green -she sent an amused look to Alea when she saw that, and it was filled with pearls and actual flowers. Under Alea's stern gaze, two maids washed her hair three times -she didn't feel clean after the first two times, and they scrubbed her arms and back until it turned completely red and burnt.