Rueann

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RueAnn

Dear Diary,

Mama thinks that we don't know. Well, she thinks that I don't know. I came home early one day from my classes and saw her and Mr. Winfred kissing through the kitchen windows. If I could see it, the world could. At least that is how I saw it. I couldn't believe that mama would be doing Ms. Jeanne like that. I went to school with her daughter for goodness' sake. We were both excited to move on to one of the negro colleges in a few months. Ms. Jeanne had never done anything to mama to make her do this. I loved my mama; goodness knows I do but she was behaving as a jezebel. The same thing she had raised me and told me to be sure I never became. I was worried for mama too. If Ms. Jeanne heard wind of this, well, I don't think that she would be alright with mama kissing her husband. She may try to hex her something. This was bad. I never told her what I saw but told her that I didn't think it good for an upstanding woman of the community to keep privately with a married man. People loved to talk, I tried to persuade her. She just brushed me off and told me that they were just friends and that she knew what she was doing. I prayed that she did. I worried for mama so.

It's possible that Ms. Jeanne does know since when I saw her in the marketplace days ago, she greeted me strangely. It was almost, cold. That had never happened before. Mama just needed to be careful. If not for herself, then for us.

Rue

Once I finished that night's entry, I stuck my pen in between the pages, hid it under the bottom of the nightstand and lastly, I took my crucifix that daddy had bought me and laid it straight on top of the nightstand next to my bible and the ring passed down to all of the girls in our family when they were of age. I loved my journal; it gave me someplace to put my private thoughts and it was not new for women in our family to keep them either. They held so much, from recipes to scandals my mama told me. It made me feel like a true part of my family which brought me happy. Feeling my eyelids getting heavy, I rolled over and said another prayer over mama and my brothers just in case Ms. Jeanne did have the power to curse others. Speaking to God made me feel better, but I still had a little feeling in my heart. Deciding to ignore it, I pulled the covers up and went straight away to bed.

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