Sub-Consciousness || KNJ✓

Chapter-2.

When will it be when she can get drunk and dance as if no one's watching, lost in her own world?

Or hands in her sweater protecting her from the chilly weather?

The wind tangling with her red hairs, a small smile dancing on her lips, warm scarf around her neck, eyes gleaming with glitters, looking around the busy streets.

A pure blissful joy?

A pure feeling of happiness?

May it be little.

But that wasn't the case, all the good things were just in her head, she can only wish and imagine them.

She didn't smile, nor she was warm, she found herself curled up on the floor, hair scattered messily on the cold floor with her breathing stuck inside her already sour clogged up throat, tears sprinkling down her eyes to, tracing the line of her nose before meeting the cold floor.

Eyes were shut tight as she tried to surpass her silent cries and ragged breathing, body shivering from the cold and chilly surrounding but it didn't overcome the pain she was suffering within.

Her heart squeezing and viens clenching through, ribs heaving harshly like a mess churning every bit of sanity she wished she had.

Everything around her was messy just how her emotions and feelings were, totally torn and ripped off was her mind and heart. An unending pain she thought she will suffocate in, no passage of breathing found in the darkness which had engulfed her long back.

Yet, it was impossible to read her, she was a wreck no one can see, no one can find, no one can earn.

A facade which she was tired of putting, trying to be better, to show her family that she is fine, she's strong, she is not affected from their aimless words.

But how long was it that she smiled genuinely?

Her eyes didn't speak, nor did her heart, she had made up a wall to block every possible fear which can let other people notice her and read her. She had already worn a viel, something to hide her real self and shut her brain up to not send any signal of emotions in her heart.

She for once wanted to be heartless to everyone, to clog up her damn feelings and the turmoil of unwavering thoughts only she was able to get hit with. She wished if people can see to how they treated her, how her own family treated her.

She wished.

In the midst of the silent room with a wave of chill air, her cries eventually stopped, laying there unmoved, eyes open ever so slightly, having her vision blur, staring at the floor with nothingness. Pale lips and dried cheeks.

A last tear trickled down her left eye before planting on the floor where there was the pool of it already gathered to how much she had been crying for hours.

Laying there for some passing time which she didn't even realised have passed, she heard faint footsteps behind her, which due to the silent room, echoed much loudly to take her attention totally.

She was least bothered if someone sees her in that state, an open wreck, a disheveled pathetic human she thought of her self to be now, not moving at all, hearing the steps nearing her even more.

Until it stopped as she felt something above her, a figure, soon a hand reaching out on her tensed shoulder making her breath shudder more from the burn of the palm against her cold skin.

"It's time for your lunch, come on, you can cry later but you have to eat" she heard that ever so familiar voice speaking softly, caressing her shoulder gently, his words sinking inside her messy mind, swallowing hard from her throat which hurted equally.