in the ends // jaq

04

Everything had been quiet in the ends recently. There hasn't been one murder in six months.

What had happened recently was that Lauryn had left, the beef with Dushane and Jamie had calmed down, Dris was dead, the council wanted to redo the block, Shelley had her own salon, Kieron bought a car off of Ruben, Jamie was in prison and yeah, basically sums it up.

I got kicked out of my flat because of the Summerhouse redo the council are planning. So I'd been staying with Jaq, it was pretty upsetting being forced out the deck.

Oh, and I straightened my hair. Well, Shelley did it because I wanted to try something new. I guess it suited me.

It was weird without Lauryn, but it was for her own good that she had left, though, otherwise we'd been in a completely different position right now. Jaq and I had gotten closer. I'd gone out clubbing with her and her friends, it was lit.

A couple months ago, I was feeling weird about Jaq. I hated her for beating the fuck out of Lauryn yet I loved spending time with her and loved it when she protected me. I got pissed whenever she was checking out other girls, catching wines from other girls at the clubs, went out with other girls. I had come to terms with the fact that yes, I had a crush on her.

But I'm not gay.

Maybe I'm bisexual but it was just Jaq. I wasn't attractive to any other women. And Jaq acted as a guy, dressed like a guy and got treated like one by most people. So did it really count as being gay? Of course it did, I'm being stupid. Jaq is still a girl. I'm just fucking denying everything at this point.

Anyways, I was sat in the living room with Jaq and we were just chilling and watching TV. She was slouched against me with her arm behind her head and her feet up on the arm of the chair. She was getting bored of the movie. I had put on 'West Side Story', a classic but one of my favourites.

Jaq kissed her teeth, "Why do you like this old movies, man?" She asked and I rolled my eyes, "It's just fucking Puerto Rican Romeo and Juliet, what's so special about that?" She sighed.

"Shut up and watch!" I scolded, "It's a good film, way better than Romeo and Juliet," I said and she sighed again.

She managed sit through the whole movie. I was sniffling a little, like always, but when I looked over at Jaq her face was wet. I started laughing at her, she clocked me laughing and sat up, hiding her face.

"Fuck off!" She snapped, wiping her face. She got up from the sofa and went upstairs into the bathroom.

I laughed and got up from the sofa, turning the light back on. I found it so easy to be around Jaq, crush or not, it just all felt so natural. I had a
feeling that Jaq should know about my crush, but also if she didn't feel the same way then everything would be weird. I mean, she flirted with me bare but she flirts with a lot of girls.

She came out the bathroom while shoving her phone in her pocket. "I gotta bounce," She told me, and grabbed her hoodie.

"Noooo," I sighed an she glanced at me, "Let me come, I've got nothing better to do,"

She hesitated and then sighed, "Yeah, alright," She agreed and I grinned, I grabbed my jacket and quickly raked my hands through my hair, "You coming like that?" She asked, referring to what I was wearing.

"Yeah, why? Do I look like a tramp?" I asked, looking down at my outfit. I was wearing my adidas sst tracksuit bottoms with a cropped white tank top that showed of my boobs slightly (actually that's an understatement) and a puffer jacket over it.

"Nah, nah, 's nothin'," She said and I nodded. I heard her mumble something about it being 'too revealing' but her words were pretty much inaudible. I ignored it and put on my crocs. I don't understand what the problem was, she was wearing a crop top too.