"you're gonna make me admit that I'm jealous lani... fine I'm fucking jealous.
He's my brother and I'm jealous of him.
That what you wanted?"
-in which 🌧️
he's in love with her but
she's in a relationship with his brother
or
-in which 🌸
she'...
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Chris's p.o.v
"Okay. That's good... he was just worried.." she says and I bite the inside of my cheek. I told her that because I thought it'd be easier.
I thought if I didn't have to admit I had feelings and that they weren't hurt every single time she stood close, even a little, to Matt that my hands didn't clench or that my brain didn't feel like it was overworking itself.
But that wasn't part of our deal anyways. Still. The look in her eyes when I told her I didn't have feelings for her was shattering?...
Was it possible that maybe she felt the pain that I did. It was starting to feel like nobody ever did as if nobody ever could. I knew it was possible but as the days dwindled on it felt like it couldn't be.
I stood up and following her, grabbing her wrist to stop her from walking out. I left the door open so she'd feel comfortable with me but now I'm regretting it because it was helping her leave me. She pulled her hand away from me and I could feel my heart sink.
"Naelani. I didn't mean it that way." I promised her. But why should she even believe me? All the things I've done to her in the beginning to make her hurt the way she hurt me werent worth it.
Sometimes I just want to yell that it's me...that we knew each other before. That I helped pick her outfits and I knew the song that was always in her mind "dangerously in love" and that I was the one that kissed her at that stupid party. It made me feel like everything was possible.
I wanted her to know that id been the calm to her anxiety and I was the one that waiting up and fell asleep to her calls. I was the one that memorized the pitch of her voice when she was happy and sad. Not Matt.
I wanted her to know that the only thing that made me nervous was after I watched every single podcast she made trying to ask for her number. And right now. Lying to her face and lying to myself.
"Yes?" She whispered but somehow along the way it became a whisper and a hiccup that got caught in her throat. She refused to look at me as a tear drop caught in her eyes. Was she crying about Matt? Or me?
Did she know that Nailea and Matt kissed? She told me. She didn't know who else to tell. And it took everything in me not to punch Matt in the face. Here he was making Lani cry. He was being a fucking ass.
