Quiet Moments c.l.

Welcome To The Limelight

"Wish we could turn back time to the good old days"
~Stressed Out
By Twenty One Pilots

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Testing is over and it's officially race week.

We are in Australia for our first weekend. I'm a little nervous but I just need to swallow my anxiety and do the damn thing.

I dominated all of testing. Everyone knows it too.

All eyes are on the faceless rookie that's taking everyone's times and shaving them off by multiple seconds.

I'm in my drivers room again. This is where I spend most of my time these days. I cannot afford to let anyone's eyes linger on me for any longer than necessary.

Today is qualifying and I advanced to Q3. It's crazy out on the circuit. The talent is mind boggling.

Every turn counts and I can't be left behind. I won't be.

I went back into my car and got ready to head out to start.

"Okay be mindful you made it to Q3. You're still top ten and takeovers will be possible in the race. Push hard through this smartly and we will make up whatever we need to in the first lap tomorrow." I gave him a nod.

In my head I thanked him for the reassurance because right now I'm shitting bricks.

I made it out and started my warm up. Silently I prayed to my angels and took a deep breath.

Go time.

I cut corners and sped up on straights. I took as long as I could to brake on the corners. I was burning my tyres to hell and back but I do not care.

I crossed the line.

"1:24:473. Fastest lap. You're starting front row tomorrow! Welcome to the limelight kid."

The cheers rang through my ears.

"Thank you guys tomorrow is our day!"

I parked and was quickly took from my seat and pushed to my drivers room. The media already had come to get an interview or just a glimpse of who I was.

Haha bitches jokes on you.

The tv on my wall showed the starting grid for tomorrow. It was me, Max, Charles, Valtteri, and Pierre starting top 5. This will be a damn good race to say the least and even better because we're front row locked out.

"Good job today. Congrats on pole for tomorrow." It was Charles, he was standing out my damn door.

"Uh thanks mate." I put on my best voice so I didn't sound like me.

"See you around mystery." When I heard him walk off is when I was able to breath again.

It just feels wrong that he's so close but so far away at the same time. All I want to do is tell him it's me and then we live happily ever after but there's no way I can do that right now.

I take a deep breath and change into my large sweatpants and hoodie, with my hood up, sunglasses on, and hat on my head.

I keep it undercover. Haha.

I walk out with my head down watching my feet. Three men of security join around me and lead me out to a car to take me to the hotel.

I can't wait to get there, take a nice shower, and go to sleep.

We pulled up to the hotel finally and I step out I brought absolutely nothing with me to the circuit except my phone and it was in my pocket so I jumped straight out and headed for the doors.

Quickly I made my way to the elevator without making eye contact with anyone at all.

As soon as I stepped into my room I shut the door putting on the dead bolt.

Wow it's been a crazy day.

I'm not sure how much longer I can stay hidden, it's very difficult. Plus I feel horrible not interacting with people. 

Soon I will show who I really am. Not now but soon.

After I make my place on the grid, I will show my face but until then I'm just number 15, the Ferrari driver.

And honestly I loved that. I knew the backlash that's gonna follow me. I'm a girl to start with. People always talked shit about me and always said that I only got to where I was because of my family.

Which isn't fair because Charles is in the same situation as me, yet since I'm a girl it makes me the entitled and a stuck up bitch. Crazy.

I had a nice little room. White and gold filled the room. The bed is incredibly cozy and the there is a walk in shower.

The shower is definitely the best part.

I took full advantage of said shower and stood in the burning hot water until it began to run cold.

I thought about everything from the time I began karting to now.

I thought about my father and how he did everything to make me happy. He was my hero, he could do no wrong in my eyes and I could do no wrong in his.

Then I thought about Jules and how he was like a role model to me. We all wanted to be just like him. He was the kindest boy. He would play with us and give us race pointers. He would come to any race he could whenever he didn't have a race. We would be so excited when we seen him walk up.

Next on my mind was Hervé and Pascale. Them and Jules helped raise me. Hervé was always a second dad when my father couldn't be there or something. Hervé and my dad were ready to kill anyone who messed with me. Well so did Jules and Charles and Lorenzo. Honestly anyone that fucked with me better pray.

Pascale was my mother in every sense of the word. She helped me learn who I wanted to be outside of racing. The clothes I wore, the makeup I put on my face, the way I carried myself. I learned it from her. She helped me realize I tolerate dresses and that I love jeans. I hate flip flops but I love heels and sneakers. She showed me that the makeup I want to wear just depends on how it makes me feel. And showed me it was okay to be a tomboy and play in the dirt with my best friends but still be able to do girl things too. She helped me find balance in life.

Then there's the boys. Arthur was the youngest out of all of us. He was the baby. But as we grew up he turned into a protector of mine just like the other guys. But he was still like my little brother and I would kill anyone who hurt him.

Next there's Lorenzo. Or Enzo as we all call him. The oldest Leclerc brother. We always had a good bond. He was still older than us but not as old as Jules. Enzo always looked out for us, all of us.

Finally, there's Charles. My best friend, since I can even remember. We grew up racing with one another. We took loses and we took back to back wins. We've laughed together, we've cried together.

It's been more than hard without him. Leaving him was the hardest thing I've ever had to do. I've missed him more than life it's self.

To grieve someone who is still alive, it's the worst feeling. It's something you can never move past.

The day I got the text from him was when I really knew I hit rock bottom. I left and I hid away from the world. No one else could save me or would save me. Only I could save myself and I did.

It all works out in the end I guess.