Only Human

Day 24

Ever since yesterday I haven't been able to get this out of my mind
Why did my dad leave?
Did he know this would happen?
Was I wrong about him?
Also why did Jay not say a word to me

This is all very confusing and I don't know how I'm going to live without figuring this out

Maybe my dad left because he knew I needed to know at some point what was happening to me

And thinking about it now.. maybe my sister is adopted
I don't remember seeing her in a hospital
All I remember is seeing my parents come home with a baby and that's it

Jay has been different though ever since I've learned about myself
He's asking me questions
Telling me rules
I don't think I can handle all of this
I love jay yes I do
But I don't know how I can do this anymore
It's too... what's the word

Overwhelming

Not everything seems like they wanted this
I didn't even want this
God why did this happen to me
Couldn't have happened to anyone else
What did i even do to deserve this?

If I told Jay i felt this way he would probably be mad
If I told my mom she would probably be upset
But I dont even know if I can reverse this

If I could reverse this I would've done it a while ago
I hate everything about this and I don't even know why

My mom is trying to be super helpful
Jay is trying to be helpful

But nothing is helping
God please take me back

But I'm just going to try and live this out, figure out how to make this less overwhelming

I can't leave Jay
I can't leave my mom
I can't leave anyone

I have to deal with this
I have to

I guess I'm not the only human any more

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OK SO... this is not how I wanted to end this story but It needed to be finished. In the span of this story I have seen Enhypen, was supposed to see TXT and now I'm seeing Itzy in like 5 days and Ateez in august. I do want to say thank you for all the popularity this story got. At first I thought it wouldn't get so popular but it really did. So thank you so much and this story is now overrrr. Ahhhhh!