spideypool oneshots

Baby, You're a Sunset

Smut

Peter Parker had always been embarrassed about his Soulmark—embarrassed, confused, and honestly a bit pissed off. He and his soulmate would be having words.

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Peter Parker had always been embarrassed about his Soulmark—embarrassed, confused, and honestly a bit pissed off. Soulmarks were the universe's way of evening the scales a bit. Soulmates were, philosophically speaking, a pretty fucked up phenomenon. You have this one chance—this one chance— to find the person you were destined to be with. What if they were dead or on the other side of the world? You'd never know. Peter had seen the effect that could have on people. He'd known a girl in highschool who met her soulmate a month before being killed in a car accident. His aunt had lost her own soulmate and now May felt like dating was pointless.

Still, the romantic in him felt a longing for his soulmate. Mary Jane and Gwen had discovered that they were soulmates in middle school. Gwen had just started that year. She'd been a quiet kid, sitting alone during lunch. Mary Jane slid next to her on the bus, accidentally knocking their arms together. Both of the girls' bright white marks had swirled with color. Now, the two delighted in communicating through their Soulmarks and leaving everyone else out of the loop. They'd been in seventh grade and already had their entire lovelives sorted. It wasn't fair. Peter sighed to himself. He didn't mean to be bitter and jaded, but at twenty-five with a Soulmark like his, he couldn't help it. Soulmarks were supposed to be this amazing thing, but everytime Peter thought about his own, he felt miserable.

"Spidey!"

A loud bang shook Peter out of his thoughts. He located the disturbance, then rolled his eyes.

"Deadpool."

The mercenary had practically been stalking him the past few months. At first, Peter had avoided him like the plague. Last week, though, there was a shift in the air. Deadpool had taken a bullet for him, and now Peter felt indebted to him—even though, technically, Deadpool was immortal. Taking a bullet was closer to a splinter than a sacrificial action for the maniac. Still, Peter was putting up with his presence these days despite literally everyone telling him what a bad idea that was. It was easier to think of Deadpool as an annoying puppy. He followed too closely, had WAY too much energy, and occasionally drooled but if Peter kicked him, he'd be a monster. However irritating Deadpool was, he was pretty useful on patrols. The thorn in Peter's side was currently unpacking several paper bags and lining up tons of take-out. Deadpool did have his uses.

"I didn't know what you were in the mood for tonight— because you refuse to answer my texts —so I brought Mexican, Chinese, Thai, and Italian."

"I don't answer your texts because you refuse to call me Spider-Man. I made myself perfectly clear on Tuesday." Deadpool managed to pout in such a way that Peter could see it through the mask. "Don't start with me, Pool. I've had a bad day."

"What happened? Do you need me to kill somebody?"

Peter glared at Deadpool.

"Why is that always your first response? No. I do not want you to kill anybody. That's the point of this whole 'rehabilitation' experiment. You kill someone, we're done."

"You know, ultimatums aren't the way to get what you want in a relationship. I have the marriage counselor on speed dial."

"This is not a relationship . It's just an experiment."

"Okay, Katy Perry , calm down."

"I don't even know what that means."

Deadpool immediately pulled out his phone and I Kissed A Girl began blasting through the tinny speakers. Peter sighed, but rolled his mask up and began to eat before the food got cold. Deadpool had insisted on eating either before or after patrols. He called it "bonding time." Peter had accepted this term with little resistance. His enhanced speed, stamina, and healing came with a monstrous appetite and he was usually broke. Eating with Deadpool meant one less meal he had to pay for. He felt a bit guilty for letting the mercenary pay, but Deadpool always insisted. It was nice in a way that irritated Peter. It irritated him because things like this made it harder to hate Deadpool.