A Warrior's Truth Fan Novella

Squirrelflight's lie - Chapter five

[THIS CHAPTER TAKES PLACE THE DAY AFTER THE THREE BECAME WARRIORS]

Squirrelflight smiled at Lionblaze as he passed her. "Lionblaze! How was it?"

"Sucky." 

She barked a laugh. "I know. Vigils are boring. But at least Firestar lets you sleep in the morning! He told me that Bluestar didn't actually let her warriors sleep after their vigil." She shivered. 

Lionblaze perked up. "Whatever. I was up all night, no reason to sleep now."

"Where are Hollyleaf and Jaypaw?" Squirrelflight asked. 

"Asleep," Lionblaze snorted. 

She pressed her flank against his. "Looks like you're alone in this one. Why don't you go talk to Berrynose? He always has something to say, either about something he did or something about him."

"'Why don't I'? Because he's annoying as the Place of No Stars!" He complained.

She chuckled, then tore away from Lionblaze to speak to Brambleclaw. About the three. They were warriors. They could be told.

_

"Hollyleaf. Jayfeather. Lionblaze. We have something to tell you," Squirrelflight began.

Hollyleaf stiffened. 

Jaypaw curled his lips into a snarl.

Lionblaze was excited, curling his claws in and out. 

"You know Leafpool? She's always been like a mother to you, right?"

"Yes," Hollyleaf mewed levelly. 

"Yup," Jaypaw confirmed with an icy edge. 

"YEAH...?!" Lionblaze said enthusiastically. 

"Well... hypothetically, let's say I told you right now that she was your mother?"

"I would ask more questions. Who is the father? Why? Where were we born? Does the whole Clan know? If they don't, who does?" Hollyleaf replied thoughtfully.

"I wouldn't talk to you for a moon," Jaypaw spat. 

"I would just smile and nod. I mean, why does it matter? I'll love you both anyway!" Lionblaze mused.

Squirrelflight sighed a sigh or relief. "Well, it's true. Leafpool is your mother. Crowfeather is your father. We didn't want to break your heart but you're old enough to take it now. The Clan doesn't know. Only Brambleclaw. We have thought of you as our real kits, but we are not your real parents."

Hollyleaf opened her mouth, but nothing came out. "Why?" She asked finally. 

Lionblaze just stared at his paws. "What... there's something wrong with you guys..."

Jaypaw looked like if he sat there  for four more seconds his head would rocket off of his neck. He ran away, branches ripping at his pelt. 

Brambleclaw sighed. "Why, Hollyleaf? Is that what you ask? Because Leafpool was in love. You guys snuck up on her. She gave you to Squirrelflight. Why does this change anything? I can still be close to you like your real father," he said. "Squirrelflight can still be your mother. This shouldn't change anything."

"Well it changes how I feel about Leafpool," Lionblaze replied flatly.

The whole group chuckled a tiny little bit. "Yup. She's not the most 'mother' cat in the Clan, I'll tell you that much. Whatever, that doesn't matter," Squirrelflight mewed. "As long as we love you."

Silence consumed all four of them. She was relieved that Lionblaze agreed with them. Or maybe he didn't. Maybe he was just making jokes to make himself happier. But Hollyleaf looked like she needed to have... a word with Leafpool.

Jaypaw will probably never talk to me again. 

_

Squirrelflight lowered her head onto her paws. Firestar had gotten the hint that she was in no shape to do warrior's work, so she just slept.

She was called many things for this. Lazy. Weak. Dead weight. 

But-

Squirrelflight woke up, terrified. The whole thing was a dream. Hollyleaf and Lionblaze just became warriors, but they were not told. 

She sighed of relief. That was terrifying. I have to talk to Brambleclaw. They can't know. 

___

"They have to know, Squirrelflight!" Brambleclaw protested. 

"But they'll hate us!"

"But they'll know the truth," he argued.

Squirrelflight stared at her paws. They will. But...  She sighed. "I think that we shouldn't tell them now. I said this when they were apprentices, but they are all super stubborn right now."

"It doesn't matter! They'll probably be even angrier that we kept the secret from them that long anyway," Brambleclaw pointed out.

Squirrelflight looked up. "You're right," she said quietly. "When shall we do this?"

"We'll do this... at least this moon," he answered. 

"But Leafpool doesn't know! We should check it by her."

A brown tabby shape scowled and jumped out of the shadows. "Oh I know alright. And it makes me think about what other decisions you've been making without me."

"Listen, I understand, but these are my kits! And this is my secret! My whole life here is on the line! If we tell them, they will certainly tell the others!" Leafpool hissed. 

Squirrelflight felt like it was a summer say in the old camp, and Leafkit was saying something about shrews being better than squirrels, then Squirrelkit getting pressed because squirrels were her namesake. 

She even caught a scent on the air that reminded her of old times. The old camp. The gorge. The ravine. Fourtrees. Sunningrocks. The forest. No lake. Just mud, trees, grass, and water, living together back there in harmony. I miss it. I miss annoying Brambleclaw a lot. She almost chuckled aloud.

But the scent really caught in her nose. It was really just lingering there. Making her feels emotions she didn't want to feel.

Anyways, her blood was boiling with rage at Leafpool. She felt like the Squirrelpaw she once was again. Headstrong, bold, angry, and ready to make anyone regret they'd ever been kitted.

"Your kits?! YOUR SECRET?! LEAFPOOL, ME AND BRAMBLECLAW ARE SUFFERING JUST AS MUCH AS YOU ARE!" She roared. "WE'VE BEEN TRYING OUT BEST NOT TO TELL THE CATS WE LOVE! WE'VE BEEN LYING JUST LIKE YOU, FOR MOONS AND MOONS AND MOONS! YOU NEED TO START THINKING ABOUT HOW WE FEEL! YOU LET ME IN ON THE SECRET, AND SURE, I TOLD BRAMBLECLAW, BUT I SWEAR TO STARCLAN I NEED YOU TO THINK ABOUT SOMEONE ELSE FOR ONCE!"

The forest seemed to pause.

Everything seemed to just stop.

No more wind, ruffling the leaves on the trees. 

No more prey, crawling around the forest floor. 

No more running lake water, washing grains of sand away.

No more forest.

Squirrelflight thought Leafpool might protest. Or apologize. But she and Brambleclaw just padded away with their heads down.

Why? Why did they do this to me? I'm... I'm alone now.