The Power Of Love And Vengeance

Chapter 5

       Life is like a maze. So complicated, you can't figure it out. One moment you're okay and happy and the next, you're sad and vice versa. One has to learn how to navigate through it. Learn how to find the correct path to the end of the tunnel. Kinda like a maze, you have to figure out which way is right so you can  pass through it. If you don't know how to navigate through it, you get lost.

           It's been three weeks since granny Maggie and Peter persuaded me to stay. And for the first time in my life, since my twin and grandma died, I can say I was happy. They made me feel loved and showed me what real love between family feels like. Peter was the smartest,  cutest and funniest boy I've ever seen.  And I hadn't seen that many guys apart from Aiden , and we all know how that ended.

        Peter loved his granny so much and always helped her after school. Despite the cards life had dealt him, he was a strong optimistic fourteen year old. He motivated me more than he could know. He had been through so much and ,yet, he didn't let it bring him down.

    And granny Maggie, as she allowed me to call her, she was the sweetest person ever. Always made sure I didn't miss my meals and treated me like her own. She said I reminded her of her younger self. She would hold me everytime I woke screaming because I had a nightmare. She would wipe my tears away and tell me it was gonna be alright.  She never put pressure on me to tell her what was going on with me.

         I had also made a couple of friend. Well, I made two but they seemed a lot to me. I never had any friends.  No one had ever wanted to be associated or acquainted with me. Amber and Luke always made sure of it. Especially Amber, she took pleasure on seeing me in misery. She loved it.

       Cole and Esmeralda were twins that waitered in granny's diner for extra cash. They were in college and I kinda felt jealous of them. They were nice to me and even offered to help tutor me until I could save up to enroll. That made me happy at least.

         Today, I woke up feeling weird. I felt dizzy and my stomach felt  very uncomfortable.  I just passed it off as tummy ache and made note in my head to ask granny for some medicine.

I went and took a shower still feeling dizzy. I got dressed  and joined Peter and granny for breakfast.  "Well, look who's decided to join us sleeping beauty!" Peter teased me while tossing a piece of bread at me.

    "Peter!" Granny warned.  "Sorry, granny!" Peter called out. "Good morning Peter, granny!" I greeted out.
" Morning!" Both Peter and granny called out. I took a sit near Peter and ruffled his hair while sitting down. Granny served me some eggs, bacon, toast with a glass of orange juice.

        I suddenly felt disgusted by the smell of eggs. I felt bile start to rise in my throat while my stomach churned. I quickly got up and ran to the bathroom. I kneeled near the toilet bowl and puked my guts out. I did not know how long I had been throwing up. After I was done, was then I realised that granny was patting my back while holding up my hair up.

           I got up to brush my teeth and went back to the kitchen. I found granny and Peter waiting for me with concerned looks in their eyes.

     " Hey, are you feeling okay? Are you sick? What's wrong?" Peter rushed out. I took a sit while granny gave me a warm glass of water to help sooth my throat. "Sweetie, what's wrong? Are you feeling sick? Why didn't you tell me? " Granny asked with equal concern as Peter.

     " No, I'm fine. I just felt sick by the sight and smell of eggs is all. It must be a stomach bug. That's it, I'm fine. Don't worry." I quickly rushed out not wanting to worry them. I had an inkling feeling I knew why I was throwing up but didn't wanna acknowledge it. It did not want it to be true, so I ignored it.

    "If you say so sweetie. Take some medicine and rest. Peter  hurry up, you're gonna be late." Granny stroked my hair while  glaring at Peter.  "Can I stay at home today and look after Ava? " Peter tried but granny already beat him to it. "Not happening young man!"

        After Peter went off, granny turned to me. "Now, do you mind explaining the real reason you're not feeling well? Sweetie, I know it's not my place but, you can tell me anything.  I won't judge or look you at you in some type of way." Granny told me in a soft voice looking into my eyes while holding my hands.

     "Are you by any chance pregnant?Do you know who is the father? Are you okay? Please talk to me. You're like a daughter to me and it saddens me that you're not feeling well." I did not know tears had started falling from my eyes until I felt granny wipe them off.

       " I ca- ca- can't. I feel disgusted with myself.  I hate myself for being weak and not fighting them off. They,  they didn't listen to my pleads. No one did." I rambled as heavy tears fell from my eyes.

     " Slow down Sweetie! What's wrong? What happened? Who are they and why couldn't you fight them off? Did they hurt you?" Granny asked with concern in her eyes. I couldn't even look her in the eyes  I was too disgusted with myself and couldn't bare to see any look of contempt in her eyes once she knew everything about me.

    She was probably gonna hate and resent me like others did. Kick me out on the streets and call me names just like my family did. No one cared about me and once she knew the secret I had been hiding, she too was going to hate me. I was scared to tell her. She and Peter were the closest thing I've ever gotten to family and I didn't wanna lose them.

     "Sweetie, please look at me! Tell me whats wrong? Why are you crying? I promise not to judge you!" Granny tried to comfort me. More tears kept falling down my eyes and granny started to get agitated.

        "Sweetie please  I'm begging you! Tell me what's wrong? Do I need to call the doctor?" Granny was frantic. She was so worried I feared she might get a heart attack from too much worrying.

     "Granny, they, they  th-they raped me! I tried screaming for help, pleading a a-an and begging f-fff for help but  bu- but no one could hear me and they never stopped. They beat me and hurt me. I hate myself and disgusted at who i am." I tried speaking through the tears. My mind flashing back to that day  the day my dignity was stolen.

" I'm sorry what? Why didn't you tell me me? Ohhh sweetie, why did you keep it to yourself? Why didn't you tell me you were hurting? My sweet little girl!" Granny hugged me to my chest while I was shaking like a twig.

      " Sweetie, I could never judge you or hate you! You're so precious to me. You could have told me you were hurting. I know it's not easy to deal with this much pain. And I know you are hating and blaming yourself but it's not your fault. Okay? " Granny comforted me.

      " I know how you feel, I was raped when I was 22. I know the guilt your feeling  but don't let it consume you. You are a brave little girl and I'm here for you. I promise you I'm not going anywhere. " Granny rubbed my back. Tears had stopped falling and  hiccups were the only thing that were coming out.

   "Come, you seem exhausted. Let's get you to bed so you can rest and we'll figure this out together.  As a family!" Granny guided me to bed. She help me get in and covered me with a blanket. She started stroking my hair making my eyes close on their own.

   " I love you and I don't care about what you've been through.  You're gonna get through this, we're gonna get through this. Sleep well little one." That was the last thing I heard before I drifted off into a dreamless slumber.