A Volatiles Claim

Windmill Down

The atmosphere was so tense inside the Bazaar today. Don't get me wrong, it was still loud with chatter and laughter, but something was off. After spending a few days in my apartment, I finally decided to return to the place that almost executed me for a crime I didn't commit. My heart felt as though it would leap out of my chest from how fast it was beating when I crossed the empty plaza this morning. And it wasn't from joy or excitement, but, for the first time, I was anxious. It only got worse when I walked inside the church. Just walking down the aisle to get to the set of stairs that led to Carl's office made my palms sweat profusely. Even though I kept my head down, I was hyper-aware of the stares in my direction and how conversations would shift to me in whispers or stop completely. I didn't know where to keep my hands, so they kept shifting from my jacket pockets to clutching the thin scarf I had wrapped around my neck that hid my scars. The weather was cold outside, so for those who don't frequent the Bazaar regularly, they wouldn't raise an eyebrow when they see me with it on.

Some people did come up to me to apologize for not believing me, and I would give them the best smile I could while telling them that it was okay... but it wasn't. Not yet. I noticed that I would flinch slightly when someone approached me, and I hope that they didn't notice, but for those that did see, I am thankful they didn't say anything about it. And while I was talking with a few friends, I would sometimes catch a glimpse of a few familiar faces, ones that I couldn't get the image of their bloodlust expressions out of my head from that night. I do wish that I had someone with me to at least give me support, but everyone was apparently occupied. Barney and Sophie have been busy with some plan, one that even I didn't know what it was about, and Veronika was at her home sleeping. Aiden's case was similar. I woke him up that day after a few hours per his request and he stayed most of the next day but left before the sun had set, mumbling about doing something for Sophie. I tried to ask him what she was having him do, but all he did was tell me not to worry about it then proceeded to ruffle my hair when I didn't look too convinced. I haven't heard from him since.

The morning after I woke up from my mini near-death slumber, as soon as the sun rose, my balcony door slowly opened and revealed the chattering forms of my family. All the noise ceased when they spotted me eating a bowl of cut-up fruit while sitting on the couch. We stared at each other for a moment before Veronika ran towards me and wrapped her arms around me, then tried not to cry when she figured out I wasn't an illusion. Barney followed soon after, and between him and Veronika squeezing me, I thought I was moments away from actually dying. Poor Barney looked as if he actually wanted to cry, but as soon as Aiden came out of my bedroom to see what the commotion was about, his 'bad boy' personality came back out. His protective older brother mode was on full alert when he realized where Aiden previously was and proceeded to ask me why the hell was he in my room. I just gave him a look that was a combination of 'are you serious?' and 'what are you insinuating?!' Aiden was in my room because he told me he had a massive headache, so I gave him some pain meds and told him to lie back down while he waited for the medicine to kick in.

Before I could get a chance to explain that to Barney, Sophie cut in and told him to knock it off then proceeded to tell the two people tightly hugging me, more specifically Veronika, to ease up on their grip or else they would be the ones to really kill me. Barney huffed at her while Veronika apparently didn't hear her as both she and Barney didn't let go of me; they did, however, lighten the embrace. Sophie only shook her head at them at their reaction before walking up behind the couch to affectionately pat my head, her own unique way of showing that she too was relieved to see me alive and conscious. They all stayed inside my apartment for a while and we talked a bit about what I was going to do now. I didn't even have to ask in order to know what they were talking about. No words could form at that moment as an internal battle in my mind had stirred up. The more logical side of me had sided with not returning solely because more instances like a few nights ago could happen again, being blamed for something and then immediately be put to death for it. While I knew that the 'evidence' at the time was seemingly solid, the sting of betrayal was still prominent. My heart, on the other hand, the core of my feelings like compassion, vehemently advocated for returning to the Bazaar to continue on my promise to help heal everyone I meet. Betrayal of course left scars on its fragile skin, but it was still beating strong and made me feel terrible each time I thought about siding with my brain as it up how many injured survivors there have been lately. Sure, they have Veronika, but the more help she had, the better the chances that people stayed alive, especially considering how many people have come into the infirmary with major wounds this month. Both decision influencing participants inside me made valid points, but I knew that it was ultimately my decision to make, and either way, I would have to make sure the option I choose makes ME feel comfortable.