How to be a Heartbreaker

29 ♥ lily

"Why did you let me go?"

What the fuck?

I immediately recognized the voice.

I look around my room frantically.

"Why did you let them do this to me, Knox?"

My heart is racing, I can't breathe.

"You ruined everything!"

That's when I see her, in her usual position tucked away in the corner of the room.

Her name was Lily.

She was the first girl I ever fell in love with.

She was the light of my life but just like every other one of my relationships, I ruined her.

I dimmed her light.

Her petals welted up.

She was unrecognizable by the time things ended between us.

The only time I'm able to see her...is in my dreams.

Or should I say nightmares?

It's the same damn nightmare every night.

She screams at me, demanding I tell her why I ruined us and I remain quiet.

Because I refuse to retell everything that happened, even in my nightmares.

It's all too much.

She's been out of my life for 2 years yet a part of me can't seem to let her go.

She was beautiful in more ways than physical.

She was intelligent, kind, outgoing...she had the brightest green eyes and long blonde hair.

She honestly looked like a princess.

Yet behind all that beauty, there was something darker.

She wasn't as innocent as I thought.

It's almost like in those horror movies when the main character seems all shy and afraid when in reality they're the ones possessed by the demon.

That was her.

And even though I knew we were toxic for each other, she had me hooked and I didn't want to leave her.

"YOU LET THEM DESTROY US!" She screams, now peering over me.

Again, I don't reply.

"Everything in my life was going great until I met you!"

Silence.

At first, when I started having these nightmares, I was afraid.