I'm Okay

Chapter 19

     Time to test my control. I had just boarded the train, and I have a list of things to do. I have to find Blaise, Draco, and Theo to discuss the order and explain why they've seen me at the death-eaters meetings. I have to find an empty carriage or go to the back of the train. Lastly, I have to figure out how to survive the night at Hogwarts. I need to figure out if I'm going to push through in the great hall or tell Snape and head to the shrieking shack to wait it out.

     Sitting down, I waited for the train to start moving before looking for them. Once it started moving, I got up to search for them.

     After spending 45 minutes looking for them, I finally found them. It took too long, but once I did find them, I opened the door and shut it behind me. It was one quick action, and took some control not to use my vamp speed.

     They jumped a little before Malfoy asked, "What do you want, Black?"

     "I would like you to join the Order," I said after I put a privacy spell so no one could hear what we were saying.

     "What?" Everyone but Theo said.

     "I would li-"

     I was cut off by Blaise saying, "We heard you. But aren't you worried about us being Death eaters?"

     "One, I'm a Slytherin. Two, I'm a death eater. And lastly, I made a deal with Voldy that prohibits you guys from becoming death eaters unless you want to."

     "We don't want to," Theo said.

     I nodded before saying, "Just consider the offer."

     "Who's making it."

     "I am, but Severus will back me."

     They looked between each other, and I left them to make the decision. I knew I wasn't going to find an empty carriage, so I made my way to the back of the train. But I was cut off by Harry. He popped out of nowhere and grabbed my arm.

     He lead me through the train and into a carriage. I saw Fred, George, Harry, Hermione, and Ron in it. I looked around to figure out what was happening.

     "Yes," I tested. When I didn't get a response, I said, "Either tell me what you want, or I'll leave."

     George was the first person to break the silence by asking, "What's going on."

     "Parden."

     "You've been acting weird," Hermione said.

     "I'm tired and need a nap. You are not letting me take that nap."

     They shared a look, and I knew they didn't want to know how I was doing. They had a different question. "Look, either ask me what you really wanted to ask, or let me leave to take the nap I talked about."

     "Are you a death eater?" Harry asked.

     I had to appreciate that he got straight to the point. "I'm not a death eater."

     "You have to be lying," Harry said.

     "Why," I said, overruling what Hermione was trying to say.

     "You leave at weird times. You're very secretive. Yo-"

     I cut him off by saying, "Have you taken into consideration that I'm still an orphan? Siruse never efficacy adopted me. I also have to pay for my own stuff, so I have a night job so I can join in the order meetings. As for secretive, I'm the only Slytherin in that house, and I can't talk to anyone if no one wants to talk to me. Is that enough?"

     He nodded, and I left quickly. I needed to get alone, or I will suck someone dry of their blood. I didn't even look to see if there was an empty carriage, so I went to the end of the train to sit outside. I had about 15 minutes before the sunset and the blood moons in the sky. I didn't need that to happen when I'm around all of these defenseless children.

     Feeling my blood thirst come out, I pushed those thoughts out of my head and focused on getting outside. Once I made it out, I locked the door and sat down to watch the sunset. It's going to be a long night.

     We arrived at Hogwarts, and I wasn't even going to try to stay in the great hall. I was struggling not to pluck one of the children walking past me. I didn't want to end my time at Hogwarts by killing one of the students who hadn't even seen the castle. I hopped into the carriage drawn by the thestrals. I managed to get on alone, and before someone could get in with me, I told it to go.

     Taking off, I managed to get to the castle in five minutes. Once there, I looked for Snape using my vamp speed. I did make sure no one was around me when I did. I found him about to enter the hall when I called out to him.

     My eye turned red, and that was all I needed to do before Snape told me to go and to be careful.

     I nodded before running away. I made it to the shake in three minutes. I put the locks in the door and locked my wand up so I didn't use it to get out. That's where I spent the night.

Word count: 887