"Don't hate me more than i hate myself", Vegaspete Fan fiction

CHAPTER 2

I'll try not to starve myself
Just because you're mad at me
And I'll be in denial for at least a little while,What about the plans we made?

Vegas watched as his husband left for his grandmother home. He was trying to hold back his tears, but it was becoming increasingly difficult. He felt like he was in a nightmare, and he couldn't bear to think of what would happen if Pete didn't come back.

Pete : "i will come back soon, take care of yourself and venice. You are a good husband and father",

Pete reminded him as he saw his taxi arrived.

" then why are you leaving me", vegas thought as his heart clenched

With a heavy heart, Pete hugged Vegas tight, trying his best to fight back the tears that were threatening to fall. Vegas tried to be strong too, but he couldn't help but feel like he was losing something valuable.

He watched with a heavy heart and a lot of dark thoughts and insecurities swirling in his mind as Pete drove away.

"i hope you find someone better Pete, i would pray that god heal you. Even though the scars i gave you disappeared, i know the pain is still there",

" I'm sorry Pete, sorry that you had to deal with me. A worthless person who can't even stand against his father"

But this thought just brought another memory back. As he remembered-

×××

Vegas: You've never gone through what I have.

Pete: Who said so? When I was little, my dad forced me into boxing. When I lost, he beat me up. Until one day, I won.

Vegas: So he stopped beating you?

Pete: No. He still beat me. I found out later that he had been a boxer. The difference was that he never won. And he kept that pain and took it out on me.

Vegas: You're saying my Papa sucks?

Pete: And has he ever beaten Mr. Korn? Got it now? They don't beat us because we suck. They beat us because they, themselves, suck.

Vegas: Nosy.

----

Even though Gun is dead, he still haunts vegas.

In the back of his Mind, Gun is still alive

"I'm fucking sorry that it took you so long for asking a break "

" I'm fucking sorry, I'm so sorry Pete "

Vegas kept mumbling to himself as he watches pete disappearing

"he will never come back", a voice in the back of his mind reminded him

" he is finally free from a monster like you. I already told you that main family pet leave you,just like everyone did."

He could hear gun laugh at him, calling him weak and pathetic

Vegas felt his heart begin to race, and he could feel the panic rising up inside of him. He was beginning to feel like he was going to faint or throw up. He had experienced panic attacks before, but this one felt worse than ever.

Vegas tried to take deep breaths, but it felt like his chest was too tight. He felt like he couldn't get enough air. His head was spinning and his vision was beginning to blur. He felt like he was going to pass out any second.

He tried to remember the techniques his therapist had taught him, but he couldn't concentrate on anything. He felt like his mind was going blank, and he was powerless to stop it.

Vegas heard his son whining in the other room and he was jolted back to reality. He knew he had to do something to calm himself down. He slowly stood up and took a few steps towards the other room. He forced himself to take slow, deep breaths and focus on his son's voice.

As he walked into the room, he saw his son sitting on his study desks, there were many crumbled paper balls thrown on. ground

Vegas suddenly felt overwhelmed with love for his son and the panic began to subside.

He slowly went to son who didn't acknowledge his presence as the poor boy was too immersed in his studies

As hugged his son tightly,to his surprise His son hugged him back and he felt a wave of relief wash over him. He knew that regardless of what happened between him and Pete, he still had his son and that was worth more than anything.

However, the warmth didn't last long. Suddenly his body was getting pushed away, making him almost whine due to. lack of comfort. He look at venice confused and hurt

"Didn't papa came ",? he asked looking around the room as he expected pete.
He turned back to complete his maths question while waiting for pete

" papa gonna come soon"

It hurted vegas, maybe he was too useless that even his son don't want him

Deep down, he himself didn't know whom he was reassuring. Himself or his son? He know he was fucking lying to venice but no matter what happens he know pete won't come back after finally running away from this hell

A tiny hope inside him was still alive, yet the insecurities overpowered his mind

The weight of the situation hung heavy in the air, choking him with guilt and remorse. As Venice looked at him with confusion, Vegas mustered the courage to have a conversation with him-a conversation that he knew would be difficult, but necessary.

"Venice," Vegas began, his voice laden with apprehension. "I need to talk to you about something, son."

The young boy glanced up from his notebooks, a mixture of curiosity and suspicion in his eyes. "What is it, Dad?"

Taking a deep breath, Vegas hesitated before continuing. "You know how Papa and I took a break? Well, he's gone back home for a while."

Venice's eyes welled up with tears, his small face contorting with anger. "he left because of you, didn't he?" he blurted out, his voice trembling with hurt and frustration.

Vegas fought back tears of his own, desperate to reassure his son. He reached out, extending his arms to embrace Venice, but the boy pulled away. "No! I don't want you!" Venice shouted, his voice raw with emotion.

Feeling his heart break into a million pieces, Vegas tried to understand his son's pain. "Venice, I know you miss your Papa. I do too. But he needed some time apart, and it's not because of me. We are still a family, no matter what."

But Venice was inconsolable. He sobbed uncontrollably, his small body heaving with each breath. "I hate you! You made papa leave! I want him, not you!"

"oh venice...

-------

Already done with ch 3 too~
I have written it despite having test and a lot of work to do, lol

Anyway, Want a double update??