Fabio's Colombo's Gay Chronicles

Darkening Clouds Above

Fabio's POV

Because your strong, but you need to let out the pain. You can't be like this to Mattia, he needs you. He says nothing, please say something Amore. He say nothing, I'm saying this because I love you and my step kids, Mattia needs you more than he ever did right now. I get up and leave, I'm just falling on death ears.

Sunil's POV

How can I face Mattia, all I see is pain. That is my fault, I should of said no. But then I would break his heart, but atleast I could fix our relationship. Bit now I've caused him pain, I'm a bad dad. I always will be, I toss and turn trying to get comfortable. I feel like my mental break down is starting, Mattia walks in. Dad are you ok, I say nothing. Please dad don't do this, I need you. When I needed you you was always their, but now your not.

It's not your fault what happened to me, I love you dad. But please talk to me, I need your love right now. Do you know how much it hurts me that your ignoring me, not caring for me. I thought you would always protect me, always be their. Do t ruin it dad, I need you so much. Johnny cannot help me, only you can. I feel like now I'm not wanted by you, I finally speak. Mattia of I did not want you, I would never adopt you. I know but, I feel isolated. You never left my side before, when I needed you last time you was taken. Don be like this dad please, I beg you. I don't want to get full of darkness, I don't want that. You called me the light bringer, but I need you dad to remove this darkness. I say nothing, please speak to me dad. He gets into my bed, he hugs me. I just lay their, I can't when sleep no more I'm too scared. When I fly like thsi I could count on you, you would make me feel safe. Please dad hug me, I feel his tears stream onto my chest. I begin to cry too, I'm sorry Mattia I whisper I can't. I turn round, he still hugs me.

Hours later he is asleep, I loft him and put him in his bed. I just Fall to the floor crying, I get up and leave.

For the last few months I have been distant to everyone, keeping myself to myself. I know it's taking a toll on Fabio, he knows I need this.

I walk down the stairs, to see Mattia crying and with a knife. I can't do this no more, I he goes to cut his wrist. I grab the knife cutting my hands, no Mattia. I just hug him, im so sorry I say. What's happened to you dad, I'm losing it. Me being kidnapped, you being beaten and everything else. I'm having a mental breakdown, but I can't do this too you. You need me, I'm so sorry I wasn't their I say while crying. My hands drip with blood, I'm sorry Mattia. See I'm a bad dad, you need some better. The best I can get is you he says, he hugs me tight. He smiles, I feel better. You have such a beautiful smile, I know you have not heard this of me. But I'm so proud of you my son, I love you so much. Want to know what my best decision ever was, dad. No, it's you. You have helped me so much, I love you Mattia. He begins to cry, please tell me why you were going to cut yourself.

It's the pain, the bullying and just everything. I'm sorry but I'm here for you, I know dad I love you. I feel so bad, I left you out. I was so selfish, see I'm a bad dad. I'm no good for you, you deserve someone better. I blocked you out, I should of been their. All I do is cause you pain, no dad. I wan you as my dad, if I could choose I'd choose you. After all I did to you dad, beat you stopped talking to you. Dad broke our stuff but yet you still cared for us, replacing out things and forgiving me. No one would support us like you.

I hug Mattia, I'm sorry. I'm so proud of you dad, you have had so many problems. But still you put us first,I love you dad do much. Mattia begins to cry, I hug him tight.

He goes.

Fabio's POV

I walk in, you both patched things up. Kinda but i still feel guilty, I need a walk. He says, can I come. He looks at me, I hate hurting you. So fine, but I do want you to come.

We begin walking, out of nowhere Sunil grabs my hand. He looks at me like he's asking for permission, which is weird because I would not say no. I smile at him, he begins to talk. I think I'm just no good, I feel like I have to prove myself to you. To my kids to show I'm better. Because I feel like im a terrible person I'm poison, I stop and hold his shoulders. Amore your not, your perfect. You do everything for everyone, but yourself. Your the best person I've ever met, funny, loving and caring. You their is no need to prove yourself, I want you Amore. No one else has a chance me, only you do.

I hug him, your just feeling this way because of everything that has happened. You need to realise it wasn't your fault no of it, yes you will feel guilt and pain. But we all know it wasn't your fault, the rest is up to you. We can't help you, but we can't do it for you.

I think I need to leave for a bit, and comeback. What wver works for you, if you need me I'll be their. I'm just a phone call away, I kiss him. I love you Amore, I know you can do this.

I get home, where is dad Ashton says. He's gone away, to never comeback Mattia says. No, he need time to get rid of his guilt. I Don't know how long he will be gone for, but he will be back.

He wanted me to read this letter to you,

Dear Ashy and Matty

My two beautiful sons, you may not get this of me alot or at all. But I am so proud of you both, through everything you been through and dealing with me. I know I tried to be the best dad I could, but I was not able to live up to that expectation of myself. Either I was away, ill or just down in the dumps. I isolated you, when I should of. I always put you both, dad, Noah, Bryce and Fabio above myself, but this ti.e I'm putting myself forward. I feel selfish doing this, but Fabio said I need this so did Johnny. So that's what I'm going to do, I love you both so much. I hope you know this, when I comeback. I do not want the issues of I pushed you both away, I don't think I can go through that again. But if you do that's your choice, I cannot change it. I will do my best to have our relationship back. I always make sure I have you both, I'm sorry I could not say goodbye, I did not to Fabio either he turned back I was gone. All I took was my wallet, I will look at your photo everyday. I even left my phone, so  this letter I slipped into Fabios Pocket. If you need me, call Noah. He is the only person to help me, Fabio if you need someone than from here on out, I'm giving you 10 free passes for Sex. Its not cheating, because we are not together. But I love you still so much, I will miss you and I will come back to you I cannot live without you. Fabio will be here for you, he does love you both so much. He treats you both as his own sons, he hopes this will make you closer to him. I am hoping to marry him, he will not be replacing your dad.

I would never do that to you both, but you both know I had to move on me. Me and your father was not getting anywhere, but I do love you. I would do anything for you both, I'll be back soon love Dad