Potion

Midnight meeting

Jesse's Buick pulled away, crunching on the pavement. I felt a little better after talking with him in the car. Not by much though.

The weather was drizzly and glum. The sprinkling rain felt cold against my skin. I breathed in the fresh air, happy to be relieved from the hospital. I'd been there all day, and it was miserable. The nurses kept taking my temperature, jabbing needles into my arm, and many more unruly things. Now it was over. Hopefully for a while.

I was pretty mad at the doctor for telling Jesse I only had two more weeks to live. He broke our doctor to patient confidentiality! I asked him about it angrily. Dr. Lance said that Jesse was my "guardian" for my hospital visit, so he had the right to know. Psh.

In the car ride, our conversation was tinted with sadness. The mood was dripping in unspoken sorrow. Jesse asked me regular questions to save the silence. Sometimes he would touch on the scary topic of my tumor. Mostly he stayed safe, talking about school and Ret.

When he stopped at my house, his eyes were pained. His hands grasped the steering wheel hard. So hard his knuckles turned white. I couldn't understand him. He was holding back, and not telling me something. Maybe he just hated me. Or maybe he was still angry that I didn't tell him about my tumor before.

I tried to shake off our car ride as I walked up to the front door. I rang the doorbell, which was slick with the wet weather.

A second later, my mom's face appeared in the sheer glass door. She smiled sweetly, her face lighting up. I pitifully smiled back. It was more of a grimace.

She opened the door and motioned me inside.

"Hi sweetness! The weathers been horrid today. But how was last night? Did you have fun with your friends?"

I stepped inside, my shoes squeaking on the tile. I answered with an optimistic voice.

"It was lots of fun. The sunset was beautiful."

My mom smiled a little thinner. She wanted more details, but she wasn't going to get any. Not from my lips anyway.

"I'm going to take a shower."

My mom nodded, her eyes resting on the floor. She bit her lip, fingering the tips of her hair.

"Willow, I want you to know I'm here for you. If something happened last night, you can tell me."

I held in a scoff. I knew she cared about me, but this was just annoying. Her soppy talks were aggravating.

"Everything's fine." Lie. "I had a great time last night." Lie.

My mom looked appeased for now. I could fool her so easily, just like Jesse.

"Okay sweetheart. I'm going to cook some spinach rolls for dinner, how does that sound?"

"Sounds yummy. Thanks mom." I replied, trotting to my room.

I shut the door and dropped my phone on my nightstand. My tunic smelt like reeking lakewater. I tried not to gag. Holding my breath, I peeled it off quickly. I pranced into the shower connected to my bathroom. Turning the water to scorching hot, I felt a strange resolution settle upon me. Like when you shake up a snow globe, and the snow pieces settle in the bottom. It gave me determination, laced with bits of fear.

I couldn't leave Jesse with what had happened today. I couldn't imagine what he'd thought when he found out about my tumor. My time in the hospital was short and sweet, but it was long and worrisome for Jesse. On the ride home, he was like the Hulk. He got so angry, I was afraid he would break the flipping steering wheel! It wasn't right, and it made me doubt if he even cared for me. I wanted closure, and I wanted today. I wanted to know, no matter if I lived or died, that he would move on. I wanted a clean break now. Deep down in the hidden crooks of my heart, I knew I truly wanted him to stay. I wanted him to be with me, and not think about any other girl. Of course, that was just me being selfish. He would meet someone worth his time. He would move on, and I would be known as the fickle girl who fell for him. Death was better than facing a life without Jesse. So I had to know. Would he stay or would he go?