❝Here's the weird thing about a hospital. You become friends with kids you'd never know in a million years. Losers, populars, stoners, nerds... the wall just kinda falls down.❞
•In which an aspiring ballet dancer joins a group of hospital residents...
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One you and two moons...
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Everything around Nari instantly went silent. All she could perceive was the muffled sound of her mother's cries next to her.
She was staring at Doctor Byun, his mouth visibly moving, but she couldn't recognize a sound. Her vision turned hazy as tears welled up, tracing a path down her cheeks.
Without her leg, Min Nari resembled a swan stripped of its wing - utterly hopeless and broken, with no chance of ever flying again. Her world crumbled right before her eyes.
She pinched herself, desperately wishing it was nothing more than a scary dream. Yet, reality persisted. Nari remained in that gloomy office, her parents staring at her in horror.
No, this can't be happening. Nari had no time for something like this. She couldn't afford such a setback. Training was the most important; ascending to the top was a must.
After all, achieving greatness was her main goal - she had to be the best! No, she will be the best! She would reach perfection. She will be perfect.
"I refuse to do it." Nari stood up, wiping her tear-stained cheeks.
"What do you mean you refuse, honey-" her mother grabbed her hand, pushing her back down. The girl winced, tugging away from her mother's grip.
"I've clearly stated that I won't do it!" she raised her voice louder this time.
"Nari, are you aware of how risky this situation is? The surgery needs to happen as soon as possible." the doctor claimed, his gaze filled with sympathy and sadness. He had been through this scenario countless times throughout his career. But no amount of experience can change the fact that conveying distressing news to his patients still caused him immense pain.
"It is my decision, and it's final," Nari's voice resonated with seriousness. The room began to blur as she gradually backed away.
"But cancer can spread. I understand how upsetting this is, but it's not a situation to be playing games. You can die." Doctor Byun pushed his chair back.
"Then so be it," she was taken aback by the unexpected moment of weakness as the words escaped her with a cry, "Without my leg, I'm unable to dance. And without dance, I'm unable to live. So I'm dead no matter the path I choose."
The doctor stared at the young girl, not knowing how to respond. By performing the leg amputation, he would be saving her life. Yet simultaneously, he would take away her ability to dance. Sacrifice, hurt, and devotion were all a part of his job; he knew emotions shouldn't get in the way.
Nari was already approaching the door before Doctor Byun could respond, "Thank you, doctor," she breathed in slowly, letting another tear escape her eye, "I just need to take some time to think about this."
As soon as she exited the cramped office, the girl started running. She wasn't sure where her legs were taking her, but she refused to stop. Her breathing slowed as she felt a cold breeze stroke her teary face. Nari found herself standing on the rooftop from last night, heavily breathing as she observed her surroundings, desperately hoping to find no one in sight.
She finally surrendered and dropped to her knees. Bringing her hands to her face, she let out loud, heart-wrenching sobs. Out of all people in the world, why her? Why? She was nothing but kind and caring. What did Nari do to deserve such a cruel fate?
Huh, they always think that. I hate to burst the bubble, but the world doesn't care how kind and caring you might be.
Your age, your character, your qualities, or your flaws – none of these hold significance. It's all just a part of life. And as overused as it is, it isn't fair. Life isn't fucking fair. So the only thing you can do is deal with it.
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When Nari was only five years old, her mother took her to watch the Swan Lake ballet show playing at the nearby theatre. It wouldn't be an overstatement to call Tchaikovsky a pure genius for composing such a remarkable piece as Swan Lake. Because the moment the first act began, Nari fell completely and utterly in love with it.
Usually, a two-hour performance of people dancing was tedious for an average five-year-old, but Nari felt every second of it. Even from the vague description of the acts her mother read, she could see it all - the grand palace, the enchanted moonlit lake, and the swan princess transforming into a beautiful maiden as she danced through the night.
The ballerina radiated so much elegance and beauty. Her graceful movements captivated Nari so much that she couldn't tear her eyes away. The music left her in a trance, and the girl entirely melted with the lovely sound.
She was too afraid to move, to blink, to breathe. She was determined not to miss a single thing. Every move, every shift, every gaze demanded her complete attention. She was absorbing every detail.
As the performance neared its end, her mother watched in shock as a lone tear ran down her daughter's cheek as the dying lovers reunited in eternity.
After the show was over, Nari's mind flooded with numerous questions. "Can we go watch it again tomorrow?" She turned to her mother and asked.
Nari's mother was a retired ballerina. She was just as passionate when she was younger. However, due to a severe injury, she never achieved her dream of performing on the grand theater stage. So, she chose to experience that dream through Nari.
The young girl dedicated herself to endless hours of training each day. "She's a natural," many claimed. However, her natural ability alone proved insufficient. Both Nari and her mother strived for more. It was a matter of all or nothing.
Despite securing numerous roles, Nari had set her mind on one thing. She was determined to become the swan princess. In order to succeed, Nari had to be the swan princess.
She had to be the best! No, she will be the best! She would reach perfection. She will be perfect.
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I'm going on a little rant since I struggled with this chapter quite a lot.
You can skip this part if you want, but I want to explain my intention for this chapter and note everything I couldn't put into words while writing it.
I wanted to focus more on Nari's temper and the desire to be the best and perfect in everything through her backstory. Her way of thinking comes from the very symbol of the white swan, representing beauty and elegance, which also portrays a form of perfection. Nari falls in love with the idea of the swan's embodiment of a flawless and angelic being, which is why she seeks to get the role of the swan princess (Odette).
There is a reason why I haven't yet mentioned the black swan (Odile).
To be able to enact the role of Odette, Nari would have to perfect the role of Odile as well. Just like in the movie "The black swan" Nari struggles to find her inner black swan as she only resides with the white one.
That's where Renjun comes in. Nari is intrigued by Renjun's art because his beliefs are exactly contrary. He sees himself in the black swan just as she does with the white swan.
While white swans openly radiate with beauty, black swans can symbolize having to look deeper in order to find beauty and grace within you and accept your flaws and weaknesses.
