Chapter 15

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JUSTIN'S POV

I woke up before Jennifer. I slowly got up from the bed to make sure I didn't wake her up. My eyes looked for my dad's car out the window. No where to be seen. He went to work. I sat back down on the bed and sighed. What does Jennifer think of me now? Am I not manly enough? I mean I just let my dad beat me up and she witnessed it. I hate myself. If only-- A low slow tune met my ears. The piano? I tried to be quiet but I wanted to catch whoever was doing that too. I moved quickly without making a sound. On my way down the stairs I saw a cigarette on the ground. I stared at it for a few seconds. I picked it up.
Put it back down, Justin.
Put it back down.
Justin put it back down.
I ignored my thoughts and turned my head to find no one in the piano room. I sighed.
Put the cigarette back, Justin.
You'll regret this, Justin.
I chuckled to myself.
This isn't you Justin.
Would your mom want this?
My chuckles disappeared.
Does a cigarette take the pain away? I don't know, maybe another drug will.
Does my dad have other drugs? I wouldn't be surprised. Should I take a look in his room?
I thought about this for maybe 20 minutes. I looked out the window then made my way to my dads bedroom. My hands searched through his drawers. I made sure not to move anything so my dad wouldn't have a clue that I was in here. Right when I was about to give up, I saw a bag with white rocky-ish things inside. The tip of the bag was pointing out of the mattresses. I pulled it out. What is this? I opened the back and took a small rock. I put everything back where it was then made my way to my room. Jennifer stared at me.
I stared at her back.
She looked at her phone.
"Soooo I think I have to go back now but it was nice staying."
I stared at her.
"okay?" She got up from the bed and put on her shoes.
"Byeee" she hugged me and left.
I sat on my bed. What is this? I opened the bag to sniff it. I'll find out later. Before you know it it begins to rain. I put on my shoes and found myself outside walking down the road.

Soon the rain died down and I was at the beach. I saw someone smoking in the distance so I decided to walk over to them.
"Hey sir, you got a light?" I asked.
The short bearded man eyed me.
"you 21?"
"yes" I lied.
"sure then son" He pulled out a lighter and I pulled out my one cigarette.
Don't do this Justin.
Be the sweet innocent boy who did no harm.
Would your mom be proud?
Soon my cigarette was red at the tip.
"Thank you sir" I walked away quickly.
As soon as the old man came out of view I tried to make my decision.
Don't. It doesn't take any pain away. It ruins your life.
The cigarette was getting closer to my mouth.
Stop.
I held the cigarette between my lips. But I haven't inhaled anything yet.
Put it away.
I sucked in slowly.
Why, Justin?
Mom wouldn't want this?
Where's the Justin I know?
Smoke exited my mouth. Stress that would never go away seemed to go away. I was confused. I felt light-headed. I sat on the sand. I took another puff.
I felt bad. Why have I done this? I continued to hate myself as I puffed. Can someone kill me? I could feel water fill my eyes. No tear drops escaped though.
The cigarette came to an end so I threw it. My hands pulled my hair.
Why?

-

The wind moved my hair around. I was still at the beach. Did I fall asleep here? Maybe not for long because the sun was still up kind of. I sat up and saw a girl sitting near the edges of the water. I squinted. Was she crying? I stood up and walked over to her. My hand touched her shoulder and she turned around. I was shocked.
"Mom?"
"Why Justin?" She cried.
"What?" My voice showed my confusion.
I backed away.
"Justin" She cried.
"No" I whispered to myself. I started to run away.
"Justin" She shouted.
"No"
"Why"
Tears ran down my face.
"No" I shouted. My feet tripped over a small brick and I fell.

-

I sat up. What just happened? I looked around and it was dark. That must've been a nightmare. I got up and walked to my house.
Why did you smoke the cigarette?

Just leave me alone.

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enjoy! sorry for how short this was lol but yeah enjoy :))

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