COTE : Three days of happyness

Pushing For A Vending Machine Tour

After walking for four hours from the community center, we finally reached the apartment. The smell of my own room was nostalgic.

My body was drenched in sweat and my feet were blistered. As I opened the door to use the shower, I suddenly wondered if I should let Horikita use it first. But if I showed too much concern, I might be the one to destroy that sense of distance she’d created between us.
Resisting the urge to keep the water running, I quickly washed myself, changed, and went back to the living room.

From what I’d seen so far, Horikita could freely shower and eat while I slept. So I lied down and went right to sleep.

While I pretended to sleep, I heard Horikita quietly head for the shower. When I was about to get back up, I heard her footsteps coming back, so I hastily closed my eyes.
“Mr. Ayanokouji,” Horikita said.

I pretended not to notice her.

“Mr. Ayanokouji, are you sleeping?”, Horikita whispered by my pillow. “I ask, of course, because you appear to be feigning sleep. And if you are indeed, then I thought it would be nice if it were out of concern for me. …Good night. I’ll be borrowing your shower.”
When I heard the door to the shower shut, I got up and looked toward the corner of the room where Horikita typically was.

She’d be sleeping there again tonight, wouldn’t she. In a position that didn’t seem like you could get any sleep in, taking a few minutes to watch and a few minutes to nap.
Just as an experiment, I sat there, imitating the way Horikita sat, and tried to sleep. But sleep just wouldn’t come.

Horikita returned and tapped me on the shoulder. “What are you doing there? You should sleep in bed,” she admonished.

“That’s my line. You should sleep in bed. It’s ridiculous sleeping like this.”

“Ridiculous as it may be, I am used to it.”

I lied down on the left side of my bed. “I’m sleeping on the left side from now on. No matter what, I won’t intrude on the right side, won’t even look. It’d be a perfect place for you to observe me up close. It’s up to you if you want to use it or not, but I’ll sleep on the left at any rate.”
I was trying to find a meeting point. I doubted if Horikita would accept something like me sleeping on the floor and her in a bed. Though even if I told her it was fine to sleep beside me, it didn’t mean she’d easily accept it.

“Are you still half-asleep, Mr. Ayanokouji?”, She asked as if confirming my intentions.

I ignored her and closed my eyes. After about twenty minutes, I felt Horikita getting on the other side.
We shared the one bed with our backs to each other. I acknowledged that the suggestion was for my own self-satisfaction. Thus, I was troubling Horikita again.

Really, she shouldn’t have wanted to do this. Responding to my kindness could damage her tenacity as an observer, built up over years.

Furthermore, the kindness of someone nearing death was a fickle, unstable thing. That sort of kindness doesn’t help people, it hurts them.
Even so, Horikita accepted my lackluster show of tenderness with greater tenderness still.

I supposed she was showing me respect. Or maybe she was just deathly tired.
I woke up with a red sunset filling the room. I thought Horikita would have long been awake, but she seemed like she’d be sleeping a little longer. I got out of bed and squinted at the bright sunlight.

The moment we made eye contact, we both looked away. After such a deep sleep, her hair and clothes were messy, and she seemed almost defenseless.
“I was just a little tired today,” Horikita gave as an excuse. “I’ll sleep in my usual spot from tomorrow on.”