Bad Habits

chapter one

I stood in the kitchen of my childhood home knowing it was the last time I would. As I waited for the timer of my brownies to beep, I looked over to the clock to see it was 3:30 am. I couldn't sleep so an hour earlier I gave up and got out of bed. I was dreading my alarm that was supposed to go off in 3 hours, because that would officially mean it's time to pack up my life, and move across the country. I grew up in Laguna Beach, California, but in less than 24 hours, I would be living in Ann Arbor, Michigan. I sat on the counter, thinking of how I would tell Miles we couldn't be together anymore, when I was snapped out of my thoughts by the oven timer. I took the brownies out of the oven and sat back down on the counter, staring blankly into the distance to avoid my thoughts. As I was completely zoned out, I didn't realize that there was someone standing in front of me. I jumped back to reality to see my younger sister Lucy staring at me with a confused look on her face.

"What are you looking at?" She asked tilting her head.

"Oh. Uh- I don't know." I stuttered.

"Okay well go to bed it's almost 4. You have so much to do tomorrow!" She nodded.

"I know. I just can't figure out how i'm gonna break up with Miles." I sighed, looking at the ground.

"So thatssss what this is about!" She smirked. Lucy had pretty much always been my best friend. She's only 2 years younger than me so we could always relate to each other pretty well. We were each others number one fans. I'd always envied her long, straight, blonde hair. It's so smooth and beautiful. She had the longest natural lashes anyone had ever seen, that complimented her big green doe eyes so well. I always thought she looked like Rapunzel because it was my favorite movie. Even though our personalities were exactly the same, we looked nothing alike. If you didn't know any better, you would think we're a family of spies not actually related to eachother, just on a mission. I have medium length, wavy, ginger hair, and blue eyes.

"Yeah.." I replied, "I feel really bad because he's been so good to me since we started dating but I just... fell out of love." I looked down at my swinging feet as I fidgeted with my fingers.

"Hey it's okay! Don't blame yourself for ending things. Why would you keep fighting for a long distance relationship that doesn't even make you happy?" She said as she got on the counter next to me.

"I know but-" I sighed "-but I can't stop feeling guilty." A single tear rolled down my cheek. Lucy wrapped her arms around me into a warm hug.

"Awh Tara" she frowned, leaning her head on my shoulder. I hugged her back and silently sobbed. "Is that all thats bothering you?" She questioned.

"No... I've been living here with you, mom, and dad for as long as i've been conscious. I guess i'm just not ready to suddenly move 32 hours away to live with a stranger I've never even met, you know?" I sighed. "You should get back to bed Lucy. I know how you get when you're tired" I laughed.

"Okay T. Love you." She smiled before turning around and running up the stairs. I looked over at the brownies I never had any intention of eating at all- I don't even like sweets- and hopped off the counter to go back to my room. I knew there was no point in trying to fall back asleep, as I would have to get up again before I could even close my eyes. I changed into leggings and a sports bra before throwing my hair into a high ponytail, knowing the front pieces would fall out moments later. I made my way down the the basement so I could work out. I've always taken exercise seriously, though sometimes it was an unhealthy obsession. It helped me to escape. As soon as I stepped onto that treadmill, all my problems melted away with my sweat. I put in my earbuds and clicked play on my workout playlist. As I stood there, practically assaulting the punching bag, I realized how violent I was being. I couldn't control it though. It was like I had a ton of anger compacted inside and it was all leaking out through my fists or something. I hit it one final time before throwing my hands up behind my head, resting them on the back of my neck. I slid down the wall and started to cry; again.

authors note: Sorry if this chapter was kinda boring!! I'm trying to introduce the characters and their descriptions one at a time instead of bombarding you with info lols. Fun fact- I watched black widow for the thousandth time before writing this chapter (hence the red hair workout addict, younger blonde sister, and spy reference) but I wrote this in a Starbucks and then American Pie started to play and I GASPED so louddd

written- september 3rd 2023
published- september 6th 2023