Dieter's Prize

Twenty-One

(A.N POV Switch to Carter. He will sound a lot more 'mature' for his age only because he is a Lycan so you as the reader can understand what happening)

Crispin's POV

Day One

Pacing around this house the only memories that fill my mind are of Dieter. Our first kiss, our first touch, our first time. His presence changed the feel of the house in a way I didn't recognize until now. Until he was gone. 

It's only been a day but it felt like my world was closing in. 

I tried my best to be present for Carter, and I fought tooth and nail against every instinct that told me to get to my mate. I wanted to. So badly. But I couldn't leave my pack. I couldn't. Not yet. 

Though it was nice to know Dieter felt the same way. My phone stayed dinging from a text from him. Both of us and our wolves feel the distance. I don't know when the next time we'd see each other. We purposefully ignored those questions because it made it too real. Now I wish we would have been grown-ups about it and said something.

Day Three

Everything hurts. My body, my heart, my will to live. Dieter and I stay on the phone at all times, we've been on a continuous call since the second day he left. We only hang up when our phones are overheating and having a broken phone would be worse than two hours of not talking to each other. But even then, it's not working. 

There needs to be more. I need to be with him. His scent is fading and is not as strong as it was in the house anymore. My bed is cold and empty and I find myself at the brink of tears at every waking moment. 

It gets harder to resist the urge to leave everything and go to him. I just want him. I just want to see him. I need him.

Day Seven

I can't breathe without him. 

I can't eat without him.

I can't live without him.

The mark on my neck that usually causes me pleasure is burning with need. It's causing my body to shut down. 

I need to go to him...I need... I don't know. 

The only thing that kept me moving was the fact I had a son to take care of. Though I think he can sense something is wrong with me. I find him standing and staring when I hand him his food. When he speaks I try to respond, but it's not up to par so he throws a fit. But when that happens I just walk away leaving him on his own. I can't handle him right now. Not on my own. Not anymore.

Day Nine

My phone broke. 

And that was my last straw. I couldn't take it anymore. I never knew what depression was, even after my parents passed away. But now I do. 

I found myself regretting many of my life choices, regretting not being smarter and not leaving to be with my mate. I should have left and been with him. But now I am stuck in bed. Pitiful. Unmoving, and unwilling to live life he is not here with me.