Dieter's Prize

Twenty-Six

Crispin's POV

I've never felt such a pain before. 

I thought the worst pain I felt was when Dieter and I were separated. But I was rudely mistaken. This, this is much worse. Grieving my son who is still alive. And there is nothing I can do to fix it. That's what makes it worse.

I've spent the last two days crying and trying to comfort myself but nothing works. I've not seen Dieter since our argument and such choice words were said. But I'm still not ready yet. I was never one to look at the goddess as cruel, but this...this is. This can't be for the betterment of myself.

I waited years for a mate, and when granted one, I got the one that comes with turmoil. I wanted a family for Carter, not for him to live in isolation. 

I find myself going back and forth on what we should do, whether or not I reject him, or continue. Though deep down I knew rejection was never the answer and will never be an option. As much as I hated to say it, what I did know about Dieter, I was growing to love. We just didn't give each other enough time to explore the bad parts of ourselves. The parts that conflict with each other.

The separation is slowly killing me it feels like. I've been sick, throwing up, headaches, and cramps in my back. I don't quite know what cold I got but I am too scared to leave this room to go find out.

There was a knock on the door and my heart skipped a beat. For a moment I thought it was Dieter, but the scent behind it didn't match. I got up from the bed and pulled the door open to see a woman with the same features as my mate.

"Hi, Crispin! It's so nice to finally meet you, I'm Georgie." Her smile was bright and it warmed my heart. 

At any other time, I would have been embarrassed by how I looked. I stood wearing sweats and my hair was an unruly mess, I was completely and utterly unpresentable. And yet, I couldn't bring myself to care. 

"Can I come in?" I realized I had just been staring and hadn't said a word. I nodded quickly and moved to let her in. I closed the door behind her and she sat on the edge of the bed. Waiting for me.

"I hope you don't mind, but Dieter told me about your tiff and I wanted to speak with you." Her smile faltered slightly, but I had a feeling it was just nerves. This was the first time we had ever spoken to each other so I can imagine she might think this was overstepping. 

"No--no, not at all." I smiled softly and she motioned to the spot beside her. I moved quickly and sat down. We both moved to where we were facing each other and for some weird reason, I felt like I was getting in trouble.

"Please, don't be upset with Dieter. I forced him to tell me." She cleared her throat and moved her dark brown hair behind her ear. "I know we are just meeting, but I see a lot of myself in you. And if you don't mind I'd love to give you some advice."

I nodded quickly and she took a deep breath and began.

"When I first met Donnie, I was so enwrapped by him. I, too did not think I would have a mate. I spent some years alone waiting for us to find each other. Then when we did, we were so ecstatic, that we marked each other right away. Like how most wolves do." She chuckled lightly. "But that caused some issues between us. I knew nothing of the sacrifice, and the deal with goddess. I was already so in love when Donnie finally broke the news to me."

"It felt like my life was being torn apart, and in my grief and worry I told Donnie that if he would have told me sooner I would have rejected him."

Though I never said those words to Dieter, it was implied, and I found myself recognizing the parallels between the four of us.