Assisting Miss Yu - Winrina

Chp. 50

"Holy shit, you were going to tell her the truth?"

I nodded, leaning back in my chair as I picked at my fingers, "Yep, and of course something was there to ruin it, and it just so happened to be Nikki."

Ningning's brown eyes studied me, "And how do you feel about that?"

I looked at her, "Seriously? Ningning I was so fucking pissed, but to be honest, I was more pissed at Karina than anything. She had told me she had closure with Nikki, that she was done with her and then the fucking night I go to tell her the truth Nikki's there? I was livid."

Ningning dropped her hands, shaking her head, "Well maybe there's a logical explanation... I think you should try again-"

"No," I interrupted, "I'm not trying anything anymore. I'm done."

I had cried all night Friday, but Saturday and Sunday I had refused myself, allowing me to build up strength to face Karina today. I was calloused again, completely solid, and I was grateful for all those years I had to cover up so much pain for making me that way. Karina wasn't going to see any emotion in me, no one was, I was done caring for people and I was done trying to be "the better person".

I was done trying to change myself for everyone else when no one gave a shit about me in the first place.

Ningning sighed, "You think she's gonna try talking to you?"

I nodded, "Yea, I know she will, and she's gonna get a rude awakening. She has no right to talk to me anymore."

Bair continued, "Winter... she didn't know you were gonna show up at her house. You can't blame her-"

"I blame her for letting that fucking bitch back into her life the night I let myself become vulnerable to her," I balled my fist and clenched my jaw, feeling the anger rush through me.

The bell rang and I stood, slinging my booksack over my shoulder and taking my place next to Ningning. The last thing I wanted to do was see Karina but I knew I would have to, but I knew I was prepared.

Then Ningning mumbled, "But Winter, you sound like she cheated on you or something, like you two were already dating."

I rolled my eyes, "Ningning, shut up."

She just looked at me, "What?"

I groaned, "She promised me Nikki was out of her life. I stopped smoking and drinking, I took a punishment for her! She fucking got me grounded for no reason, I stole a fucking twenty-thousand dollar check for her and then this happens? I fucking did so much for that cunt and then Friday night happened, so excuse me for actually expressing my pain for once, Ningning."

She just stared up at me, nodding, "Alright Winter, I'm sorry. I'll see you later."

Then she turned away, leaving me to walk the rest of the way to Karina's class alone. I hadn't meant to blow up on her but it had just come out, and I felt bad immediately, but I wouldn't chase her down. Hopefully she would forgive me.

I was slowly approaching Karina's room now, and soon she came into view but I didn't allow myself to look up at her. I didn't want to talk to her, I didn't want to look at her, and I knew facing her today would be hell. And no matter how bad I really wanted to talk to her deep, deep down, I wouldn't do it, because it would just end shitty anyway.

I couldn't look into those eyes.

Then before I stepped close enough for her to grab my attention, someone else did.

I heard Yeji's familiar voice, "Hey bitch."

I rolled my eyes, looking at Becca and Yeji, and then accidentally looking past them and into Karina's worried eyes that were dead-set on me.