I stare aggressively at my phone.
It's already Thursday, and I haven't done anything besides make an account. I've been so scared to talk to her I haven't even gone to school this week.
Is it too late now?? Still too soon??? Apparently, there's a waiting rule for this stuff????
I roll over on my bed, looking at the ceiling. It's nearly been a week, what if it's too late? I sigh and open up Instagram.
Maybe I should follow her or at the very least find her on here. I don't know if I should though, what if I missed my chance?
Maybe she forgot about the whole thing, maybe it was a mistake that she put the paper in my pocket. Yeah, that's gotta be it. That's at least what I'm gonna tell myself.
I get up and get ready for school since I've skipped almost all week and I can't avoid Miliani forever, besides I probably might not even see her, I've never seen her before until that incident last week.
Also I need to get out of this house, I'm tired of hearing mother banging dudes in her room. There's only so much my headphones can block out.
I look at the piece of paper Miliani had given me. I think it's best for her if we're not friends. I don't want to ruin her life.
━━━━━━ 🍓 ━━━━━━
I place some books in my locker and close it with a sigh. That's three classes done. I don't know why I'm kinda bummed out that I haven't seen Miliani even though it's actually a good thing.
Why do I long to see her so bad?? Ugh!!! I should've stayed home today as well.
I start to walk towards my fourth period when I feel someone grab me and press me against the lockers.
I squeak, scared that it was Jayshley back for revenge but then I see Miliani's big brown eyes looking down at me. "Trying to avid me?"
Her forearm was above me against the locker and she was holding my chin up with her free arm, making me look up at her.
She was so close to me and her body was pressed up against mine, I could feel my cheeks get warm.
Miliani smirked, "are you blushing? I didn't know you could blush." She said looking at me with sparkly eyes that made me weak.
"N-no!" I said trying to look away but she kept my head still.
"Fucking dykes!" I heard some guy laugh with his friends. The smile on Miliani's face disappeared and the sprakle in her eyes faded.
"Come." She grabbed my wrist and we headed out the back door of the school as the bell rang for class to start.
"W-what are we doing?"
"Ditching."
"WHAT?!" We're ditching?! But school has security and I've never just left school grounds.
"Maybe we should go to class.." I say nervously as Miliani ducked behind a trash bin, looking for any monitors.
She then grabbed my sweater and pulled me down with her. I heard her slowly count to five, I'm guessing she was counting the seconds?
"Ok. Let's make a run for it." Miliani grabbed my wrist and sprinted, dragging me with her. Behind us I heard one of the staff yell and run after us. Oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god!!! I'm gonna be in so much trouble!!
I pushed down all the voices in my head telling me to stop and just ran along with Miliani. The feeling of the wind against my face was nice. I smiled, feeling like I was free, like I had conquered my worst fear, like I was actually alive for once.
We ran until we left campus, adrenaline pumping through me. It was amazing.
We got to a field with a track where people came to exercise. We set our bags down and sat under a shady tree.
I looked over at Miliani, she was looking at the ground deep in thought. She looked so pretty. Her hair was being pulled back on one side by a hairclip which looked really cute on her.
"Miliani... umm.. are you ok?" I asked her. She was startled and looked at me with her big eyes. "Yeah, I'm fine." She replied but I didn't believe her.
I wanted to be able to help her but I don't want to force her to talk about things she doesn't want to. After all, she barely knows me.
"You can tell me if something is bothering you. I know we haven't known each other for very long but.. even if I can't help, you can vent to me." I told her.
She smiled and rested her head on my lap, making my face feel warm. "Thank you, Isaura. You're really sweet." She said softly.
We sat like that for a while, it was really peaceful. I mean, I was panicking the entire time but, it was really nice. Somehow I felt at ease.
"Now, why have you been avoiding me?" She asked. I stiffen at her question. I didn't want to hurt her feelings or something. Do I lie? Tell the truth? Sugarcoat it?? "I.. was really nervous to talk to you..." I replied softly.
Miliani looked up at me and gave me a gentle smile while rubbing my cheek. "You don't have to be nervous around me, silly. She said and I gave her a weak smile. "Sorry if I came on to strong, you seem very shy and anxious so I probably made it worse." She added. I was gonna deny it or say that she didn't but.... I just smiled and nodded, giving a small thank you.
To be honest, no one has ever apologized for forcing me out of my comfort zone. I've gone through so many panic attacks caused by my mother and teachers and they would never be sorry. In fact they'd be angry at me. It felt freeing that someone acknowledged my feelings for once.
"Hey, Isaura?" Miliani said after a while.
"Yes?"
"Do you, maybe want to go to the flower festival with me tomorrow? It opened today and the flowers are always prettiest the sooner you go."
Wait wait wait. She wants me to go hang out with her?! So.. she actually did enjoy hanging out with me last week? Oh man, I dunno if I should say yes or not.
I mean, I want to go with her, I liked being with her she made me feel all nice and stuff. Ok, I think I'll go. "Sure." I said with a small smile.
"Hey Miliani?" I said after some time of silence. "How come you want to hang out with me? You're being really nice and I don't want to sound rude but it's strange. No one really wants to hang out with me." I said nervously. Was she doing this out of pity?
Miliani thought for a while. "Because I like you." She said simply. That was anti-climactic.
"So.. you really truly want to be my friend?" I asked.
"Something like that, I think." She said and seemed to go deep in thought again.
What did she mean by she 'thinks'?? Did she not want to be friends?? Is us hanging out a test for her friendship?? I mean, it makes sense.
I think Miliani saw the confusion and worry on my face because she smiled and sat up, pulling me to her chest.
"I'm not gonna leave you though, that's for sure." she said softly and ran her fingers through my hair.
I wanted to stay with Miliani like this forever. I don't want this moment to ever end. I felt so safe with her.
