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Chapter 1 - Zariah

"PLEASE STOP RUNNING TINO" I yell hoping that he would take my instructions into consideration, but shocker the little shit doesn't.

"Look how fast I'm going MOMMMMY" he yells a little louder as he gets farther.

Right now, we're on the beach. He pleaded with me all night to go the following morning and gave me the "take me or I'll scream" expression, so I was forced to give in. He wasn't a kid who made a lot of demands, so it came as a bit of a surprise when he asked for something. I was the complete opposite so it was obvious this trait came from his parents.

Although I think of Antonio as my own, he wasn't really mine. My older sister Kiyana told me she got pregnant when I was 15 years old with a man she met at a nightclub. She refused to move in with him after bringing him the news, so he purchased her a house in Little Italy, New York, where we were living. I moved to the house to support her during her pregnancy in his place. A week after my birthday, she delivered Antonio, and it was unquestionably the best day of my life.

She was taking his birth tremendously hard. I was concerned at first, but after researching I found out it was a normal occurrence that took part in first time mothers. I was taking care of both Antonio and Kiyana, going to school and working. All that hard work felt rewarded knowing I was taking care of them.

One day after I came home from work around 9pm the house was completely dark and empty. Considering that Ki would wait up for me every night, it was immediately concerning. After searching the house, I discovered Tino fast asleep in his nursery. Since I knew Ki wouldn't have left him alone in this situation, I grabbed him up out of fear that someone had abducted her. I silently and carefully looked through the other rooms until I found her room, which was chilly and vacant. As though she had been gone for several hours.

I looked around for any signs of struggle that I could report to the police, but instead stumbled upon a note admitting that she couldn't take care of Antonio and also be happy and how she chose her happiness. Complete BULLSHIT!!!

The Note

Hey Z,

I'm so sorry to do this to you, but it has to be done. I'm leaving and not coming back. I love you and Antonio more than I love air, but I know for fact that if I haven't already will in the future ruin him. I know that this is the cowardly thing to do, but it would break my heart to see the absolute hurt written across your face that I know is residing there as you read. You're good for him Z. He loves you and you love him.

I'm not only loosing myself, but also my happiness and will to live. I have to choose me for once. I sincerely hope that you can understand that.

Love Ki

She was right it broke my heart. I was 16 left to raise a 4 month year old baby, how could she not think about my future, my happiness?

I eventually quit school, obtained my GED, and applied to university online. I began working full-time, and fortunately, Loretta, a sweet Italian woman, let me to bring Antonio with me. While I worked, she would watch over him and teach him Italian.

But it was still so hard. Everyday I thought about finding his father, but there had to be a reason she was so adamant on him not being in Tino's life.