If Only
Iya's Pov
Do you believe in destiny?
"Iya are you still not done?"my friend asked as i continue to write
How about in the invisible string?
"Wait I'm almost done" i said after writing the lecture I forgot to write the other day
They said that the person you're meant to be isn't really a total stranger, you guys have met already a couple of times, but wasn't able to connect, may it be in the side walk, in a party, school, work, everywhere..., you guys have already crossed paths a couple of times but you guys didn't know it , was it destiny?, on second thought what is destiny?...
"Iya, iyaaa"my friend brought me back to reality
"Why do you keep zoning out? Are you really that bored in my story?" She pouted
" I'm sorry my mind was somewhere else what did you say it was again?" I asked acting like i was interested in her another yet failed love life
I was once in the same situation as her , don't get me wrong i only meant the failed love life part
Wanna hear a story?
It was quite a long time ago...
(Years ago)
"We were happy right?" My tears were falling down on my face
"Yes, just like what you said, we "were" , but not anymore , you're only hurting yourself please rest" he said with the voice i used to love
Just why, how can he say that so easily? , was i not enough, was my actions not enough?, did he not feel that i really love him?, why did it come to this? I wanna fix it, i still wanna fix everything, im fine, i can endure it just stay please, don't leave me, we'll fix it together, we'll be better together, we'll grow together, how can i rest when the person whom i thought of as my resting place is gonna leave?, how do you expect me to rest, how can you be so cruel?
Is what i wanna say...
"If we're really for each other, someday we'll meet again right?, with the best version of us, when we're finally healed, you have to let go iya" his words were like knives stuck on my chest, it hurts , i kept clinging onto him...., i don't wanna let go, who does when that person is the best one you've met right?
"I don't wanna let go, please let me hold onto you a little longer" i kept begging
"Im really sorry ok?" He wiped my tears , just how hurt I must've been , did he think about that?
"Meeting you was so unexpected, being with you was so magical, everyday how i wish i could see you right beside me , it was a very special chapter with you, now we both have to let go, stop begging you'll only hurt yourself more" he kissed my forehead
"Please take care of yourself ok?" His voice was so sweet
"Rest iya" then I finally let go of his hands , he left without even looking back , i lost in the war , I watched his back as he kept getting further away...
Destiny is so cruel...
Why did destiny destroy everything?
Who should i blame?
Just why did everything happened?
I'm lost, everything was so dark, the hand that i held was no longer there, i cannot see the signs anymore, i was starting to be blind, i tripped somewhere and now i cannot see where I'm going , am i still on the right way? I kept asking my self ...