Crush (Siglai/Fyogol) (Hiatus)

The basketballs hate me

It was a twelfth of October at school two years ago. When we returned after a year and a half of being locked down due to the pandemic, classes were one day on and the next day off. They called it alternation.

That's when I saw the boy I thought was the most handsome guy on Earth.

His name was Oguri, Mushitaro Oguri. He had short, perfectly groomed hair, and yellow eyes that were mesmerizing to behold. How was I not supposed to fall for him?

I think that's when my tragic romantic life began.

That twelfth of October, we had a physical education class, and we were playing basketball (by the way, I'm really good at playing basketball), so I thought I'd impress him with my athletic skills.

Little did I know that when I threw the ball, my hands were shaking so much from nerves that I missed the shot, and it bounced... and hit Oguri in the nose, breaking it. The impact made him stagger backward, and in my rush to help him up, I tripped and fell on him.

"You're an idiot!" he yelled at me.

No matter how much I wanted to apologize, he didn't accept it.

What bad luck!

"The basketballs hate me!" I exclaimed dramatically to my friends, Dazai and Fyodor. "I don't get it! My aim is absolutely perfect! Could it be that someone put a spell on me?"

"You overthink things, Gogol," Fyodor opined. "There's no such thing as witchcraft or the occult. Horoscopes are just a marketing strategy, and tarot is a scam. You were just distracted and threw poorly, that's all."

"Have you apologized yet?" Dazai asked while eating.

"I've done it a thousand times!"

"Try again; maybe you haven't done it enough."

"Don't listen to Dazai. Just stop insisting. If you keep chasing after him all the time, you'll scare him away."

"Well, maybe he's not the right person for you. Don't worry so much; you still have the rest of your life to have a boyfriend, girlfriend, or whatever you fancy. I wish I had money."

"That has nothing to do with it. Although I wish I didn't have anemia."

"That doesn't matter either; it's about getting, not getting rid of."

"Well, I can get rid of anemia."

"You're an idiot."

"No, you're the idiot!"

While Dazai and Fyodor continued to throw food around, I remained quite dejected.

"Time? What time are you talking about? My parents became a couple at sixteen! They got married at twenty-three, and they had me at twenty-eight! That's seven years of dating and five of marriage to start a family. That means I only have four years to meet the love of my life, twelve years to get married, and seventeen to have children. It's not enough time!"

"You worry too much, Kolya. You'll find the love of your life, maybe not now, but perhaps later."

"But I have to do it quickly!"

"Why?"

"I don't want to have children after thirty! I'd be an old man! I'll leave here at sixteen, then two years of higher education, which means I'll graduate at eighteen. Depending on the career, it could be between three and six years of university, but let's say I graduate in four. That would be at twenty-two, and if I do a master's degree right away, which is two years, I'd finish my studies at twenty-four. After another four years of working, that is, at twenty-eight, I would have enough resources to support a family. So, I would have my first, and probably only, child. If by then I don't have a stable partner, I won't be able to have children even if I have the capital! That's why I have to find that person with whom I share a special bond, so we can have our life sorted out."

My friends stared at me.

"...Wow," they both said.

I kept trying and trying to apologize to Oguri, but he wouldn't even look at me. The year ended, and I realized he had failed a subject and would have to repeat seventh grade. When the next school year started, I tried to talk to him again. I had his number, and I asked a friend from my music class to text him on my behalf.

What Mushitaro-kun told him about me was excessively cruel.

"Nikolai? No, not at all. I don't even find him cute."

Ouch.

"I mean, he's very weird. Definitely not my type."

Double ouch.

I never saw him again. I heard he had changed schools. I was also told he had found a boyfriend.

That was my first romantic failure at the age of twelve. And at the age of thirteen, I had my next one after meeting another of the most handsome boys I've ever seen in my life.

Chuuya Nakahara.

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This is a translate. I don't speak english. I speak spanish. So, if you find any mistake or something, please let me know, tysm

Thanks for reading!