Never Again. { Freehoun ONESHOT }

Never Again.

My head felt fuzzy as a bright light blinded my view. My lungs filled with the cool, salty air as the breeze tickled my skin and ran through my hair. I tried to collect my thoughts as my eyes slowly creaked open; an azure horizon stood right before me. Hypnotized by the beauty, I couldn't help but have a familiar, yet unknown feeling dent through my chest. Am I forgetting something?

I continue to daze upon the vast, blue horizon as I heard a faint voice beside me, getting everso louder by the second. "..Barney..." it muttered distantly. "Barney." The voice seemed to be getting even louder, but my gaze was glued to the horizon, unmoving. "Barney!"

The voice finally struck me out of my trance. I swiftly swerved my head towards my left side, finding a tall figure standing before me. "I- Yeah, wha-? Sorry," I apologized, still somewhat disoriented by the growing, hollow feeling inside my gut. "What is it?"

The tall, scrawny figure fixed his glasses and smiled at me; his short, brown hair swayed like blades of grass in the wind, and his pale, hazel eyes met with mine. "What's wrong, haha?" the man laughed, playfully patting my shoulder. "Thinking about that beer you still owe me?"

I stared deep into his eyes, before realizing who it was. "Ah.. Really, Doc?" I shook my head and chuckled to myself, once again finding myself gazing upon the large, azure horizon in front of me. "Sure, sure it is."

There was a silence between us. I didn't know what to say, but I just felt joy and... pain. I felt a mixture of emotions towards that man... the 'Gordon Freeman,' my best friend. I don't know why I felt this way, and the feeling was slowly but surely eating me away. It felt like I haven't seen the man in ages, yet I literally just saw him at yesterday's shift in Black Mesa. Am I forgetting something? What happened on yesterday's shift again?

Gordon would slowly turn his head towards the horizon in front of us and let out a sigh. "It's nice to take a day to rest after yesterday." He would once again fix his gaze towards me, this time, his expression seemed rather annoyed-mischievous. "You wouldn't believe what I had to do down in the chambers!"

I turned to face the man again, tilting my head with a confused smile. "Yeah? What was it?" I chuckled as I set my elbow on the railing, my head resting on my hand, gazing into his eyes. "What'd they make ya do in the test chambers, Gord'n?"

Gordon shook his head and slightly leaned towards me. "They had me push a.." He paused, laughing to himself for what he was about to say next. "A LAWNMOWER into the goddamn Anti-Mass-Spectrometer!" Gordon then leaned back once again, laughing hysterically at his story and its absurdity. "And I'm only surprised it didn't start a whole-ass Res. Cascade!"

Ah. That's it. It all clicked when I heard those words. The Resonance Cascade. My smile wavered into a bitter one as my gaze moved to the clear horizon once again. That wasn't yesterday. That was 20 years ago. My face flushed slightly as my eyes started to blur the glaring, glistening water into blocks of blue. This isn't real. He's gone.

Another moment of silence swept around us, with only the subtle clashes of waves and birds distantly echoing. Gordon looked at me, his expression slowly changed as he noticed that something might've been bothering me. "Hey, seriously." Gordon then placed both of his hands on the railing, his gaze still fixed onto me. "Is everything alright?"

The bitter smile was still glued onto my face as I shook my head. "I just.." I paused, looking below me, watching the waves clash against the building. "I just had an awful dream last night, okay?"

I could feel Gordon warmly smile at me, as his silhouette inches slightly closer to me. "Would you like to talk about it?" His gaze locked onto me, and in the corner of my eye, I could see his glasses reflect the cerulean hues of the sea and the sky. Our eyes would meet momentarily, causing me to get a little nervous.