Giving Up

Chapter 1

(Rewritten, please tell me if there are any mistakes) I had fun writing this, so I hope you enjoy.

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        I laid awake on the bathroom floor, the feeling of numbness filled my body, making the voices go away. The blood was now dried on my hand and wrist, leading down my arm.

         I stared into the mirror in front of me. The girl who stared back was pale for loss of sleep, faint scars tracing all over all over her face. Long black hair framed her face, tips died bright aqua black and dark purple. The girls bangs hung down in her face, covering part of one eye, adding to her mysterious atmosphere. The feature on the girls face drawing the most attention were her eyes. They were a swimming, aqua blue with dark green specks. The colors were beautiful but her eyes, the held no emotion. They were empty, lifeless and guarded. As if someone had poked and proded at her soul until nothing was left.

         Glancing at the rest of the girls body, something was out of place. She was skinner then average and about 5'7. The thing making her look out of place were the scars. There were thousands leading up and down her body. Some scars were faint,  more then a couple year old. Others were fresh, not even a few hours old. The worst part was some of the scars were made by the girl herself. 

        This was me, I am the girl in the mirror. When I looked at myself, my mind screamed, 'ugly'.  I shook my head, ridding myself of those thoughts before they got any worse. I grabbed a white hand towel from next to the sink and started to scrub my arms of dry blood. By the time I was done my skin was raw and very red. Sighing, I walked out of the bathroom and into my bedroom. I glanced at the digital clock on my nightstand. 4:47. Great, I still had three hours till anyone else woke up. I slowly began to ready myself for the day. I trugded back into the bathroom, stripped of my pajamas and jumped into the shower. 

        I did the usual routine. Shampoo, condition, all that good stuff. My body was slightly red from the heat of the water but I didn't really care. I wrapped a fluffy towel around myself and went to pick out an outfit. I grabbed a pair of ripped black skinny jeans and a grey sweater with a black arrow on it. I slipped on a pair of black ankle Converse and put on a necklace with a lock charm. I made my way downstairs. The house I live in is huge. It has about ten bedrooms. a cinema, a bowling lane, a gym and a music room. This hoouse was way to big for just three people.

        As I walked into the kitchen, surprise hit me hard. I sucked in a deep breath. What's going on? My eyes trailed over the kitchen, which had become an ocean of boxes. It looks like we're- I cut myself off. No! We couldn't be moving, could we? Manuevering around the boxes, I grabbed a water from the fridge. My eyes wandered to the lone apple on one of the shelves. I reached out to grab it but quickly pulled back. 'Don't want to gain weight, you're already fat.' My mind taunted me. I frowned, looking down at myself. Sighing, I slammed rhe fridge down shut. I took in my surrondings while I sipped my water. Furniture was missing, along with the appliances. Oh no, we are definitly moving. 

        Panic clouded my brain. Moving means a new school. It's my last year of high school and I'm moving, perfect. I didn't have much at the school I went to currently. I had no friends, there were a couple people I would wave at in the hall or make small talk with, but other than those few people, I had no one. Everyone else just ignored me, thought I was some weird girl in the back of the room. I wasn't bullied or anything. I just didn't exsist. Freshman year I had a few people who tried to befriend my but I pushed them all away. I had to much luggage and I refused to pull anyone else into it. 

        There was one thing I would miss. Music. I loved the music room they had at my school. The teacher was wonderful and let me come in whenever I felt like it. Music was my escape. I had a music room in my house as well. I jogged down the hall to see if all my stuff had already been put in boxes. Most of my instruments were packed away but my acoustic guitar was still out. I could play guitar, drums, a lot of different percussion instruments, flute, violin, saxophone, trumpet and I could sing. Music was what I did in my pass time....I have a lot of pass time.