I found you

[23] Yok

"How do you know Yok?" Ayan asked perplexed. Akk didn't answer but it made Ayan finally realise something.

"Wait don't tell me...Are you...Is he..." Ayan stopped. He already could guess the answer. Everything made sense now. Why Akk seemed so familiar. Why Akk reminded Ayan of him.

Akk looked at him unsure what to say. He only managed to nod, confirming Ayan's unfinished questions. Ayan was speechless. Why hadn't he realised earlier that Yok and Akk were brothers?

Ayan tried to organise his thoughts. He noticed that even tough Akk and Yok were brothers they didn't look alike at all. Only the way they behaved was the same, although Akk was more reserved and suspicious of others while Yok was more rebellious and outspoken, making him a good leader who truly trusted others. But the way they handled things and observed others made Ayan realise how similar they really were. Like they were almost the same person, just with different looks. They both even had the same soft side towards the people close to them and would protect them at all cost.

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Akk finally recognised the design on Ayan's hoodie. How could he have not recognise it sooner? It was one of many designs his brother had drawn in his sketchbook. Yok had always been very interested in astrology and tried to combine it in his art, using many geometric forms and techniques. He had ended up with a bunch of different designs and often proudly showed Akk his latest drawing, asked for his criticism and even gave him some of his designs.

"So I'm right. Yok was in your gang." Akk just said. His voice was expressionless and he felt strange, almost unmoved upon finding this out. But there was still something in the back of his mind that was troubling him. He should be happy that he had finally found out a little bit more about Yok. But in reality Akk realised right now that after all his hard efforts he still didn't know more about his brother's whereabouts than before. Nothing was actually clarified. It was like he was running in circles for years without finding a way out or stopping himself.

Akk felt like he was going crazy. He was dissatisfied with his search, frustrated with himself, even disappointed. For the first time since the incident Akk thought of maybe giving up. Restarting his life. Letting go of his painful past. He had been so exhausted and depressed to the point he couldn't even sleep at night because he was so wracked with guilt and paranoid that something might happen to him. Akk didn't know if he could continue like this any longer. Maybe Gumpa was right. Maybe he should let Yok go and finally live his own life again...

"Akk?" Ayan gently called him, noticing that Akk was zoning out again. Akk looked up to him. He could see the worry in Ayan's face.

"If it's ok with you, can I ask something you something about Yok? You know something, don't you?" Ayan asked with a serious tone. "Please tell me if you know something about him...please..." The desperation could be heard in his hoarse voice.

"Aye, I-" Akk began, but hesitated. He thought again whether he should tell Ayan the truth. It was too hurtful and Akk didn't know how Ayan would react when he heard it or if he could even bear it.

"Akk...please tell me...we are searching for him for months now. We just wanna know if he's alright." The desperation turned slowly into fear.

Hearing how worried not only Ayan but also Yok's other friends were, something in Akk changed his mind. They had the right to know, too, and perhaps they could even help him find out more about Yok.

"Ok, I will tell you everything." Akk took a deep breath to stay calm and began to talk.

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