I SEE YOU

DISCOMFORT (RIVER'S POV)

Normal people go out on weekends or spend that time at home recovering from their hectic weekday schedule.

But I'm not a normal person, which is why I'm in a locker room right now preparing for a fight.

My bandaged hands keep hitting the punching bag, and as relieving as this is. I can't wait to get in the ring where I'll have the pleasure of watching my opponent bleed because of me.

See, the reason I didn't tell Ash my real profession is not because I fight. It's where I fight that would put me in a predicament. I'm an underground fighter which means what I'm doing isn't really legal.

I could have joined the MMA but that comes with clout when your as good as I am. It's bad enough that even with underground fighting, I bump into people who recognize me almost everyday. But it's better to be low key famous without the paparazzi.

The money is also really good, but that's not why I fight. When I fight it's the only time I can release this anger that's eating me alive without holding back.

Funny thing, Mercy was the one who recruited me about six years ago. That's kind of how we became friends, but that's a story for another day.

The bag suddenly becomes steady and I throw in a few more punches before stepping back.
Mercy peaks at me before letting the punching bag go and helping me sit on a bench. She massages my shoulders and I relax into her touch.

"You good??" I just nod while craning my neck to get rid of some of the tension there, I haven't really been sleeping well which is nothing unusual. In fact, I tend to just stay up most nights and get carried away by my thoughts.

"Okay, I need you on your A game tonight. Your fighting Alexis and she has never lost a fight, she's bigger than you so you'll have to be smart about this one.
Just stay focused, can't have you flanking"

I've never fought with Alexis before, but I've watched her and the woman is a beast in the ring. All her opponents get out with a part of their body broken, and this is giving me a deep thrill.

She's a worthy opponent for sure, but I've never lost a fight either so the best woman shall win.

"I bet the audience is going crazy with the bets on who is going to win." Mercy chuckles while nodding her head in agreement.

"The bookies are making some pretty pennies today, I think this is that one fight everyone is having a hard time to predict. I'll admit that even I can't be sure right now, anything could happen."

I don't take any offense in my best friend's words because even I can't be sure. My chances of winning and losing are fifty fifty at this point.

Mercy clears her throat as she lets go of my shoulders to come sit in front of me. Her dark eyes hold something in them that almost has me worried.

"Is everything okay??" She quickly nods and smiles a bit.

"Yah yah, I'm okay.
I just, I was wondering if you have Ash's numbers." She looks at me expectantly while my posture straightens and I'm suddenly alert at the mention of my roommate.

"Why were you wondering that?" I think I already know the answer to my question if I'm being honest.

Yesterday I thought Ash would be as awkward as usual around Mercy, but I was taken aback that they actually got along. They were even flirting at times, and I'm not really sure how I feel about that.

"Well I guess I'd like to know her, she seems....interesting." Her smile widens when she notices the suspicious look I have on my face.

"I just want to be her friend okay." I raise my brow and this time she rolls her eyes.
"Okay, maybe friendship isn't all I want. But it's really not a big deal, I felt a genuine connection with her."

"I've heard you say this before and it never ended well." She nods her head in understanding.

"I know, but this time it's different." I raise my brow even higher and she chuckles. "Okay, I've said this too before. But I'll try to keep things light, I know you don't like Ash and I'm not trying to put you in an uncomfortable position here."

"You think I don't like her??" I'm genuinely shocked and it's clear in my voice. Mercy shrugs one shoulder before speaking.

"You've been complaining about her since you moved into her apartment, and never have anything nice to say about her."

I guess that's true. But I don't necessarily dislike her just cause I don't like her, does that make any sense??

"From all you've been saying about her, I was surprised when I met her. She's nothing like you painted her to be." Mercy's words cause me to gulp. I never realized or even intended to bad mouth Ash.

Something about her just disturbs me and I have no idea why.
It's frustrating because she's always in my face, it doesn't matter that we ignore each other because I still see her everyday.

"Why didn't you ask for her numbers yourself if you want them so bad??"

"I wanted to but she seemed so sad after mentioning her divorce. I didn't want to overwhelm her."

"Divorce??" My eyes are the size of saucers right now, I had no idea Ash has been married. But then again, even she herself said I don't know a lot of things about her.

"Yah! I could just tell she got fucked over real bad even though she didn't share the details. Which just makes me want to be closer to her, I'm not trying to rebound from what happened to me or something like that.
I just, I don't know but maybe we can give each other some closure."

My heart tugs because of the small smile on her face. Mercy was married too, so I know this is kind of a trigger. I hate it so much when she's sad, I'd do anything to reverse what happened and have my friend whole again.

She's always bubbly to hide her pain but I see right through the facade.

"Hey, how about this. If I beat Alexis and win this fight, I'll give you Ash's numbers." Something churns inside of me as I say this, but I push it away and place my hand over hers.

Mercy's face instantly lights up and that gets rid of some of the aching in my heart.

"Well then, let's prep some more and make sure you hand Alexis her ass." She grins and I force myself to do the same.

It's normal for me to be worried, right?? I'm just looking out for my friend here. I mean if things with Ash don't go well I'll be caught in the crossfire whether I like it or or not.

Mercy is my best friend and Ash is my roommate, I don't want any of them getting hurt in any kind of way. But then again, maybe they really will give each other closure and be happy together.

If that may be the case, why won't this discomfort in my chest go away??