Sleepwalker Wolf

Epilogue

Trevor (Surprise!)

Winter is always an interesting time of year. The entire family is cooped up inside pretty much all the time unless we're shifted into our fur sides and we very quickly grow tired of each other. Mostly they grow tired of me, but I just can't help myself. Saying dumb shit is my life's calling. The only person safe from it most of the time is Valery, but that's only because of how bitey she gets, especially since my brother knocked her up.

She's been throwing up for weeks and was about the size of a house when it finally stopped. It's a miracle she still fits through doorways. I kept that to myself otherwise every member of my family would take turns handing me my ass and I quite like my ass. It's a very nice ass.

All of us siblings are lounging in the upstairs living room while Mom cooks dinner downstairs, Eve with a fat textbook in her lap on the floor while I mess around with the bun on her head, Eli enjoying is break in his usual way of sitting on the couch like a statue or reading, ew, and Val and Trav are shoving PDA in all our faces and generally bumming me out. Thankfully, my go to for any and all situations is humor, so no one can ever really tell when I'm bummed out. Except Trav, but I blame that stupid, creepy twin telepathy thing.

Trav and I, for all our lives, talked about what it would be like when we found our partners, imagining what they would be like. Trav was always far less specific than I was. I wanted her to have long hair, a fat ass, great tits, and an A+ personality. Trav just wanted her to be nice and, clearly from where I'm sitting, let him slobber all over her like some kind of rabid animal. Over the past six months of so much failure, my list of qualifications has gone down to just one. She just needs to put up with me because there's obviously something wrong with me that no one fucking wants me.

"Hands above the table!" I shout at the two disgusting love birds when I can't clearly see my brother's hands anymore. Blegh.

With a dramatic groan, Trav pulls his face from Val's neck and drops it against the back of the couch. Val just growls at me and gives me the stink eye. She's been so sick they haven't gotten to do the hanky-panky in a while and it's clearly showing. I swear to God, if Trav stands up right now I'm going to need to wash my eyes out with a gallon of bleach to keep it from imprinting on my brain forever. We might look identical, but I don't need to know if we look identical all the time.

"Trev, please, for the love of God, keep your damn mouth shut."

"Impossible. Nobody has managed that feat before and I doubt anyone ever will."

Val looks over at Eve and asks, "Sandy has a sewing kit, right?"

"Hey, if I don't get to have any action while I'm stuck in this house with all you hooligans, my brother sure as hell isn't," I demand. "Even if that means I have to cozy up in between you at night, I'll do it."

Through an evil little smile that makes a shiver run down my spine, Val glares at me. "What if I sleep naked?"

"Ew!" I crow. "I don't even want to think about that!" I look forlornly down at my right hand. "Looks like it's still just you and me for a while, buddy."

A pillow is thrown directly into my face, which isn't actually that surprising. It's better than my sister-in-law's fangs in my arm again. Witch.

"I do not want to know about your masturbation habits, big brother two. I think I'm going to have nightmares now," Eve growls, snatching another pillow and launching it at me. Thankfully, I catch this one and swing it over into Eli's face with the same swing.

"Welp, too late now. Have fun with your nightmares tonight. I already know what I'm doing," I trill, waving at her with the fingers of my right hand. "I'm spending some quality time with my best friend."