9/15 I want you to ruin my life
You to ruin my life, you to ruin my life, yeah
I want you to fuck up my nights, yeah
Fuck up my nights, yeah, all of my nights, yeah
I want you to bring it all on
If you make it all wrong, then I'll make it all right, yeah
I want you to ruin my life
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there is so much that happened - way too much to unpack
but that's not why I'm typing today...
9/25
i hate how much i still think of him...especially in the pits of my depression. i just think of him and how he would understand and make everything alright. he would take me away from here. away from it all. theres so much going on and i cant handle it. i want to escape. i need help. i dont know what to do anymore.
i feel trapped again.
i dont know what to do.
i cant do anything about it anymore. i did this to myself. i trapped myself. were stupid. you are so stupid. what the fuck did you do. you ruined it. we have a good life. we had a perfect life. i could escape. i could run. i didnt feel alone. i could hangout with anyone...
little do you know...
we could have met in high school.. i wonder how different my life would have been..
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9/26. Tell me I'm crazy. There is no reason for him to be in Virginia. He is not in virgina. That is not his miata. There are mutliple miatas. I am imagining things. People hangout in the parking lot and leave cars there all the time. Stop being crazy.
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9/29 @ 11pm. Why do I find comfort in fictional killers?
