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Two weeks later...

The Australian GP was ahead of us.

Only a few hours until i had to get into the car and start the race from the 9th position, i wasn't a bad qualy, but i wasn't able to do the last fast lap due to engine issues. I would rather start there than don't start the race at all if i crashed the car. This weekend was going alright, a lot of media duties, meetings, and training, i hadn't had time to even sit down for five minutes. I wasn't complaining, if i sat down for five minutes i wouldn't be able to get back up and my mind would get flooded with everything that had happened in my personal life.

Thins with Oscar were a bit weird, we haven't really spoken since he left my apartment.

flashback...

I couldn't lie to his face.

I took a deep breath, looking straight into his eyes, feeling my heart beat faster and faster as the seconds went by. I moved one of my hands, placing it on one of his cheeks and i gently caressed it. My heart did a flip when i noticed a small smile on his lips. It wasn't a good idea to look at his lips, the need to kiss him grew even more inside of me, but i couldn't. It wasn't right, even if there was nothing i wanted more.

— Oscar.—  i whisper.—  I can't tell you that, i can't lie to you.

His smile grew bigger and i couldn't help but smile as well.— That's all i needed to hear.

— Wait, it's not that simple.—  he slightly tilted his head with a confused look, i wanted to hit him for being so cute.— Look, i can't forget about what happened but that doesn't mean it can happen again. I'm with Franco.

His grab on my waist got loose.— ¿Did you tell him about the kiss?

— Yes, i did. And we are good, he understood and we are "a thing"

He fully let go of me, and i sighed, closing my eyes for a few seconds. I was scared to look at him, so i focused on my hands. I was about to pick on my fingers due to anxiety when Oscar grabbed my hand to stop me. I looked up and i pressed my lips together.

— ¿Do you truly like him? — Oscar whispers.

No, i don't.

I shrugged my shoulders.— I don't know. I'm not sure of my feelings for him since the kiss. You truly put my world upside down.

I tried to make a joke but neither of us laughed. Our hands stayed together and i couldn't look away from him, i wanted to figure out what was going on inside his head, but it was of no use. Oscar was gently caressing my hand, with his gaze lost in some part of my house, and i just stayed there, by his side and enjoying the sense of comfort his touch had in me.

— I think it's better if i leave.— he says after a while.— I'm sorry for any inconvenience i may have caused you, Lowie. It wasn't my intention at all.

He gently kisses my forehead and leaves my apartment, without letting me say a word.

end of flashback...

Our conversation left me thinking for hours and hours. Thinking about how much i wanted to run after him. I didn't.

Anyway, the last race was alright, i finished p10 bringing one point home. One was better than nothing, that was what everyone told me, but i wasn't satisfied with my results. The car was good, and we had the pace and the team, but i made a lot of mistakes that cost me points, i was not myself that weekend, everything that had happened messed up my mind and i wasn't fully focused. I beat myself a lot for that, the next week all i did was spend time in the simulator and training, only answering a few calls from an exclusive group of people. Thankfully, Mick and Ivy took me out of that routine, bringing me back to reality.

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