i hate u - N.N (DISCONTINUED...)

001

i hate nelson neumann. i hate his curls, i hate his smile, i hate his bright blue eyes, i hate the way he covers his mouth to laugh, i hate everything about him. whenever i make eye contact or even face him i get flashbacks from a night i wish i never remembered.

i'm currently standing outside of his front door, birthday gift in hand. it was niles birthday. My mom didn't let me stay home because she says i've been rotting in bed all week. even though i love niles with my whole heart i didn't wanna go. i didn't wanna run into his bother.

"Hi nelson! you've grown so much since the last time i've seen you" my mom hit my shoulder causing me to look up. i instantly regretted my decision as i locked eyes with him. memories started flooding in as my smile fell into a frown and tears brimmed my waterline.

it was friday and i decided to invite some friends over after school. my phone was at 5% so i went upstairs to get my charger. i opened my door and my heart sank to my stomach. i froze not knowing what to do. nelson was sitting on my bed while his lips were on hers. i was in love with him but he obviously didn't know. that still didn't give him permission to kiss my best friend on my bed, especially her. i fully walked in and yanked the charger off of my bedside table causing them to pull away.

i looked over and met his eyes while i felt tears running down my face. "wait penny i can explain" he reached for my shoulder but i just threw his hand off and walked out. i didn't understand why i felt the way i did. i mean he wasn't my boyfriend or anything and he obviously didn't like me back. "come on penelope don't be like that.. please" he shouted.

"just go home.. both of you" i yelled back. "please penelope come on stop being so dramatic it was just a kiss" i didn't know what else to say. i was filled with shock and confusion that all i wanted to do was go to my bed and cry. yet i can't even do that without still feeling their presence lingering.

"my moms somewhere in the kitchen" he moved out of the way to let us in. i felt his eyes burning holes into the back of my head as i made my way towards the table placing the gift bag down. "penny you came!!" i heard niles yell from the living room. the nickname triggered more memories. he always used to call me that.

"i couldn't miss my favorite neumanns birthday" i ruffled his hair as he hugged me. i felt guilty thinking about how i almost missed his birthday over his stupid brother. "do you wanna go on live with me?" he asked as he let go. "sure" i nodded following him upstairs. i stopped walking and stood in front of nelson's door.

"i wonder what he's doing" i thought to myself. usually whenever i would come over we would go to his room and just hangout, but things were different now. "why'd you stop?" niles turned around causing me to take my eyes off the small crack in the door. "sorry.. zoned out" i responded as i looked back into his room. i guess he heard us and turned around in his chair making eye contact once again.

i looked at the floor then back at him. i had to go before i did something i was going to regret. i looked back at him once more then started walking towards niles room. everywhere i go it feels like i can't escape him. even if it was in my own house i could still feel him. i knew he was in here by the way his cologne lingered in the air. i made my way towards his desk and sat down

he started the live as i leaned back in my chair and went on my phone. "thank you guys for the birthday wishes" i heard him say. i put my phone down and looked at the chat to see what was going on.

nelsontheprodigy_  joined

great, even if i try my hardest to forget about him entirely, he'll always be there. i went back on my phone as niles answered more questions. "whys penelope so quiet" he read. "i'm not sure i don't think she's feeling the best right now so just let her be" he continued. i felt bad for not paying any attention to him despite it being his day. i put my phone on his desk as i focused on whatever he was doing.

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"happy birthday to you happy birthday to you happy birthday dear niles happy birthday to you" we all sang as he stared at his cake. he closed his eyes and blew his candles out. "what'd you wish for?" i asked with a big grin on my face. he opened his mouth and then closed it hesitating. "i just wished for things between you and nelson to go back to normal" my face dropped as i looked over at nelson. he was already looking at me.

"why'd you waste your wish on me? you could've wished for something nice for yourself" i looked back at him. "i just hate seeing you sad penny" he continued as a frown creeped up on his face. tears started brimming my eyes once again but this time they were happy tears. "i love you niles, never forget that" i hugged him as he stood up from his seat. "okay..time to open presents!" cassie said awkwardly moving all the attention towards her

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on the drive back to my house i couldn't stop thinking about what niles said. would things ever even go back to how they were before? maybe it's all my fault and i really am being dramatic. i laid my head down on the window and closed my eyes. i need to fix this one way or another.

rory speaks!

first chapter rewrite!! hope you like it