Trouble // l.h

Chapter 2.

"Northern Downpour"- Panic! at the Disco

Crying. Such a natural, yet rare thing in most people's lives. They cry when their dog dies or when they get hurt. But was it really normal to cry every night? To be so deep in emotional pain that everything is amplified by ten. That the stinging of tears hardly exists anymore and the blurriness is welcoming. Was it normal to muffle sobs into a pillow when all that was wanted was to scream as loud as possible?

"Sleep is for the weak. #yolo" she tweeted. So basic and old yet she hadn't noticed. She was always the one to hop on the bandwagon about a week too late. She bought her first North Face when everybody else started selling theirs on eBay. Are Kavus even still in style? She never really understood why no one wanted to talk to her. She never really thought anything of it.

She had lived her whole life with one person, her dad, so her personal hygiene tactics were different then most girls. She did what was necessary and what had to be done but other than that she never really thought that she was different.

She did what was needed and never really wanted much. She kept life simple to avoid getting the wrong kind of attention.

Pressure was something that she had never handled well. Endless nights before competitions spent wide awake. The fear of failing also factored into most of those sleepless nights. Hardly ever sleeping had caused dark bags to form under her eyes, yet she was still uniquely beautiful. Sleep used to come easy to her, but nowadays she was lucky if she got any at all.

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She put her earbuds in to avoid hearing the mumbled voices of her classmates. Panic! at the Disco. Her favorite band. Thank God because any other artist would've royally pissed her off. It was already a shitty day, shitty music wouldn't have helped at all. She walked up to her locker which she hardly ever used. The only thing she ever put in it was her textbooks and that was on rare occasions. Like mentioned before she liked to keep things simple.

"Only a year and a half left to go" she unenthusiastically mumbled to herself. At school she never voiced her need to be popular. In fact she never really told anybody about her fascination with the need for attention. Nobody would've understood anyway.

She shut her locker and started walking down the hallway to get to her first period. She wasn't even close when the bell rang signifying that she was late.

School drug on for her that day, most like every other day but something new and very unexpected happened as she was walking out of the building that resembled a prison.

A fight broke out.

Fights were pretty normal, especially between the boys in her school. But it was the boys that were in this fight that actually caught her attention.

Luke Hemmings and Michael Clifford.

Luke was always being teased about what he wore and who he hung out with. They used to be best friends, but Lycia hadn't talked to him in over a year now. But she had seen his YouTube videos, she knew his talent.

Michael was basically Luke's worst enemy. They lived across from each other and were best friends as children. Not only did he make fun of Luke nowadays, he tortured him with the knowledge of their past friendship. Anything and everything known about Luke came from Michael Clifford's mouth. But he never told anyone the good Luke had done.

All anyone in school knew about Luke Hemmings was how his mom caught him at his first attempt at masturbating, and how athletic his brothers were yet he had hardly even touched a soccer ball.

Nobody knew how great Luke Hemmings would become, and no one expected him to be alongside Michael Clifford on their long, treacherous journey to becoming superstars.

Now on this day, February 7th, 2015, Luke Hemmings was standing up for himself.

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This is Lycia's journal:
"Every one wishes for world peace, but no one ever does anything to ensure it.

Parents always tell you to get off of your phone, but when they need help with the iPad you're always the one they depend on.

Life can be so confusing and complicated sometimes, but all we need is ice cream and cuddles. Instead of violence, why not music? Why can't everyone just think alike and be happy and not judge others or put others down?

Why can't society just be accepting and not disown someone at the start of their first mistake?

If accidents happen for a reason then why do I have to be dragged back up whenever I fall down? When is my "reason" finally gonna show up? Hopefully soon because I don't think that I can take this anymore"

- 2/7/2015
Lycia Toni Riggs

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She wrote in her journal every other night. And each entry had a different, complex vocabulary that sounded like a dictionary had written it. Tonight she just didn't feel like being professional. She had an emotion inside of her that was slowly tearing her apart. She felt like she needed to let loose and finally be free.

She didn't want to be free.

She needed to be free.

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Hey. This chapter was all over the place and didn't really make much sense, but hopefully I'll get better.

There's gonna be a song for each chapter and I'll put a video at the top for it. Panic! at the Disco is literally my life btw. I could look at Brendon Urie dressed up and tell you which video it's from. Or interview. Or which concert and when and where it was. Oops. No sorry.

Anyway. I hope you liked the chapter and I'll update soon. I love you guys. Stay trippy and pop a trace my friends. (Old janoskians reference)

Sincerely,
Leah (the singer)