The Tales of the Golden Girl

A Robbery Gone Wrong I

My relative (or Bigman as I called him) had a new mission for me. Steal the queen's crown. He recognised my agility and told I would get only ten percent of the loot.

I banged my hand on the table and bargained. That was a skill I learned from my home country. ALWAYS BARGAIN.

"Well, give me 50, I'll carry out this mission solo."

He replied in his gentle but commanding voice "20 is all you get. You're a kid. You don't deserve that much money."

I was offended. I banged my gun "40 percent. Give or take. Or else you take your fAvOuRiTe girl Sadie for the mission."

He sighed, "40 it is."

I breathed a sigh of relief. I knew he wouldn't stoop so low. He knew what was coming.

As I got ready for the mission, I got the whereabouts of the place. It was outside London, away from the traffic. I had only been to London for robberies.

I reached the place. Very musty, filled with algae. I just wanted to spray tan myself with perfume.

As I reached my satchel to gather the rope, I didn't feel anything. Fuck fuck fuck.

"It's ok, it's ok." I murmured to myself. I had to scale a thirty foot (nine metre) wall without rope.

I did have the option to enter the place as a tourist and then bomb the place, but Bigman said "Don't make a ruckus." Said I with perfect mimicry.

Now, I had to scale this wall. Luckily, I knew how to climb without a rope. I saw many cracks in the walls and thought: "Maybe I can put my hands in these cracks.

I started to climb.

Hey people! Even though this is a very big leap, Sam is climbing a f-ing wall!

And what did you think about the "ALWAYS BARGAIN"? She said it was from her home country. Any guesses!!?

And yes, I'm lazy to insert new media.