luke and vada, despite : luke

despite other people lingering

40

"and that is why you will need to learn to think on the spot," my design professor says, "you'll never know what the client will ask of you...."

i tune him out as i rest my chin my palm. i'm staring straight at the whiteboard, though, looking as though i'm listening.

i think i've perfected this art, of making professors think i'm listening. when really, i'm thinking about a certain boy in the psychology building.

with the help of calum and michael, i was able to ask for luke's schedule of classes. i need to know this for me to plan properly.

my 40 days of trying officially starts today. during sunday yesterday, me, noelle, and ashton were cooped up in my dorm room. we were brainstorming until night came and ashton had to leave.

i tap my mechanical pencil on my sketchpad as i look at the clock. only a few more minutes.

it's monday today, and i only have 2 classes in the morning, then i'll be free for the rest of the day.

as my professor yaps on, i continue to think about what i'm going to do later. it's not anything big or grand, but one thing it will be is thoughtful.

i believe in the little things, that even doing the subtlest things can help show how much a person means to you. especially if they're heartfelt, and come from a place of pure and good intentions.

"any questions?" professor palmer asks, catching my attention. this question means that the class is about to end.

"no questions? none?" he asks again, to which the other students shake their head sideways.

"in that case, i will be assigning you to..."

i sigh, another task to add to the never ending to-do list.

i listen this time and jot down the professor's instructions. i want to laugh at the thought, since i rarely take notes and now, i am. not for the sake of being a responsible student, but to distract me from the nervousness i'm starting to feel.

i look at how many pages of the notebook i've used up, amounting to more than half. i used the same notebook during my senior year of high school, and decided to carry it over to college to use up the leftover paper.

i turn the page to the very back, wondering what doodles i may have written while i was bored during history class.

i try not to let out a giggle when i remember the conversations ashton and i would have using this notebook, passing it back and fourth. there also are a lot of song lyrics i wrote down, probably when i couldn't get them out of my head.

they all look like the normal words and doodles i'd write during class. just before i closed the notebook, though, there's a phrase written in unfamiliar handwriting that catches my eye.

i read it in my mind, now completely tuning out professor palmer and his instructions.

a hand flies to my mouth to stop me from making a weird noise that can cause people to look. i just read the most gut wretching words i've read in a long time.

"my heart is an unmade bed; it might look messy, but i swear it is a safe place to rest."

"luke..." i whisper to herself, now realizing exactly who's handwriting this is.