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I woke up to the sound of my Iphone ringing,
I groaned at the noise, why can't a black man rest anymore? Bitches steady blowing my phone up.
It was an random call, prolly a spam..
"hello?"
I don't even know why I answered..
"Josiah."
My eyes widen, soon bringing my free hand up to my mouth gasping, "H-harlem?" i asked as i listened to the person on the other side of the phone sigh.. "no."
"so who is this?"
"It's mark."
"m-mark..?"
"yeah baby."
By this time I was a crying mess, "h-how are you c-calling me !?" I asked him as I heard him chuckle "I got phone privileges ." he told me as I looked down not knowing if I should hang up or continue to sit through this traumatizing phone call..
"I just wanna know something Mark, w-why did you cheat on me? Why did you beat on me? Why did you ruin the happiness I ever had with harlem since I left you? I was finally not alone and you fucked it up! I fucking blame you!" I yelled through the phone as I heard mark sigh,
"Josiah.. The only person who fucked up what you had going on wit dat nigga is you. Yeah, I shot em. I'm paying for that and more as I sit in this cell every-night thinking about it.. But it's your fault y'all aren't together right now. Not mine. It's your fault he is a dead beat not by choice. But I just called to apologies for everything, I'm sorry JoJo, I'm sorry." Soon the phone hung up and I was left to think about what mark said..
And it's true , he was right.
Would I accept his apology ? Fuck no.
But I'm glad he apologized ,
★ 𝟐 𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐤𝐬 𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐫..
"No for real! I'm starting my job at the new studio today, my own fucking studio built from the ground up." I smiled to myself as Brianna rolled her eyes, "It's only one floor Jo." she said as if I didn't know. Girl I made the layout and everything, just had it built for me." I told her as I watched her with furrowed eyebrows and a tilted head.
What is she trying to get at? I'm doing my best the fuck..?
"I'm just saying you have money.. why not use it?" Brianna shrugged as I frowned, My bottom lip jutting out as I felt my heart began beating rapidly, I soon roll my eyes — ugh! Why am I panicking right now, she didn't even mean it in a bad way, don't take it that way Josiah..
But why would I need to spend all my money on that?
"Brianna I do what I want with my fucking money." I spoke bluntly out of the sudden anger I built up in just a few seconds, soon bringing my words to a stop and taking a deep breath.. "I'm sorry." I told her soon bringing my hands up to my face and groaning..
Leaning back into the gray couch that lined up with the coffee table and tv in the living room of my home.
Brianna's eyes widened as she soon sighed pursing her lips "no I'm sorry Josiah, I was being insensitive. Save your money, do what you want." She told me giving me a sweet smile as Jolani soon walked out of his bedroom in his paw patrol pjs rubbing his eyes.
"Hey sweet.. you hungry?" I asked my son soon standing as he nodded frowning as he looked up at me..
Brianna gave a smile towards Jolani as he waved at her and said hello, I really need to talk to him about what happened in the store a few weeks ago.
"Lani.. do you know that man you were talking to at the store?When i popped you.." I asked my son as I took out a small bowl and miniature spoon soon glancing down at the boy who had followed me into the kitchen and shook his head no, "No daddy."
I rolled my eyes soon,
Soon groaning frustratedly, deep down I know Harlem is his daddy and it scares me so much to think about Harlem finding out..
A part of me wonders what Harlem thought in that moment? Like— is he mad that I "moved on" or something? Not that I really care— we would have never worked anyways.
Now that I think about it, I see Harlem in Jolani so much and I just wish I was bold enough to even tell him about his son..
But I'm scared to even talk to Harlem.
I'm scared he's gonna judge me, that he will never understand why I didn't want us to work out.
And look at us now, not working out and finally seeing each other after 3 years, like.. I don't really know what I really expected but I just wished I could have seen him or something..
Soon pouring fruit loops and vanilla flavored almond milk into the bowl, putting everything back and then setting it at the kitchen table and picking up Jolani sitting him in his booster seat.. watching as he quickly picked up the spoon and soon eating paying me no mind, I closed my eyes taking a deep breath soon going back over to my couch and sitting down beside Brianna..
Now speaking quieter "Brianna I can't take this anymore I need to see him." I told her as I brought my hands up to my face.. "I miss him so much."
