I'll Never Stop Crashing

A talk with destiny...or Willa.

After Fletcher and I ran into each other at the beach he asked me to walk with him. Fletcher was a very convincing young man. And with eyes who could say no? For some reason I gave in. I was still mad at him. Three years ago he kissed my best friend and then moved away. But he made me feel so alive when I was with him. So there I was sitting on the jetty. The giant rock wall separating the beach from the mouth of the river where the boats would traffic. I didn’t say anything as we walked on the rock formation. Until he interrupted the silence.

“Crash I think we need to talk.” He looked at me with sincere eyes. And ran his hand through his dark brown waves. 

“What is there to talk about Fletcher?” I glared and kept walking. But he grabbed my hand and pulled me back, spinning me around so I was inches from his face. I hadn’t realized how much older he looked. He had more freckles than ever and his shoulders were broader. He had a scar right above his eyebrow as well as under his eye. As well as stubble on his chin. 

“Crash you need to listen. I’m not going to hurt you. Please just let me talk. You don’t even have to say anything just listen please.” he was pleading. His eyes softened and his brows furrowed. “I miss you.” he mumbled. I just stared at him not knowing what to say. I didn’t know what to do. 

“Then lets talk it’s long over due.” I shot back at him. If only he knew I missed him as well. I was hurt. After he left I shut everyone out. I became independent. I had friends, but I just didn’t trust anyone anymore. 

“But not now. Later.” I looked at him. He was confused. I turned on my heels. I jumped down onto the soft sand. And did what I had been doing all my life I ran. I sprinted down the beach and all the way back to my house. But I didn’t stop there. I ran down and into the Gortons house. Now you must be thinking why on earth would she do that? Well I had to talk to someone. And since no one knew Fletcher better than me well the old Fletcher. I went for the next best person. Willa. I walked into their house. The yellow walls the same as my kitchen. Mrs.Gorton was sitting on the stair case reading. 

“Oh Crash sweetie what are you doing here? Fletchy isn’t home you can catch him another time. He’ll be home in a few hours or so. Give or take.”  She replied in her soft motherly tone.

“Sorry Mrs.G! I was actually looking for Will...? Is she home? I need some girl time.” I smiled at her but in return got a confused look back at me. You see I’ve been a somewhat tomboy my entire life. So ‘girl talks’ aren’t really my thing. And Fletcher and I are the only ones that knew about the whole Carrie and him thing. Well and Shawn. But he didn’t tell anyone. 

“Yeah sure she’s in the kitchen.” she was still confused. I would normally laughed but I was still extremely pissed off with Fletcher.  

“Hey Will.” I said greeting Willa with a half hearted smile.

“Sweetie whats wrong?” How did she do that. 

“Nothing I just wanted to hang out. Have some girl time.” I replied quickly. 

“Honey it’s all over your face who’s the boy? Plus you never have girl time. Don’t fool me Ser.” I sighed and sat down. I didn’t want to talk. I just wanted Willa to be my fairy god mother and make everything go back to before that stupid party. Where I wasn’t heartbroken, without my two best friends. And when I could control my life. Instead of running away from my problems. 

“Crash you’ve gotta say something. Seriously.” I looked at her. And her eyes softened. She was reading me. “Oh no. No. NO. Crash honey I know that look.” 

“What look?” what was she talking about.

“You had a fight with Fletch. This isn’t about a boy. It’s about the boy.”

“Willa what on earth are you talking about?” 

“Crash I know what happened before we moved. All of it. Fletcher came home drunk that night. That kid can drink for a fourteen year old. Even though he shouldn’t any way. He passed out on my bed that night. And when he woke up the next morning, well afternoon, he freaked out. He knew what he did was wrong and Crash it was bad.” she was being pretty  realistic. Fletcher can be pretty calm during bad situations. “He cried.” she whispered. I was shocked. Like literally. Fletcher never cries. Like ever. I looked at Willa as a tear rolled down my face. She grabbed my shoulder. And looked me in the eye. 

“You guys need to talk. It will never be the same if you don’t. I know you both care about each other. And us moving back has brought back bad memories, as well as good ones. But this kind of thing won’t fix itself.” I nodded. She was right. But I was scared as hell.

“Thanks WIll.” I nodded and stood up. And wiped the tears off my face. “Oh and Crash. In Florida, he never had a girlfriend. Not once. He had friends but he wasn’t as popular as he was when he was here. He was kind of depressed. Crash he wasn’t the same really. Don’t think he’s changed because he moved. He missed you. A lot. He never said it, but he did it was all over his face. Just like it’s all over your face you like him.”