By Chance | Book One |

Chapter Fifty Four

Lyra

River didn't say much after he pulled me close to him.

He only asked if this was okay before he fell asleep holding me close, both arms wrapped around my small body.

I tangled my fingers in his soft chocolate hair.

I felt so bad for him.

I lost the closest person I had, but River lost that and the other half of him.

Everything started to make sense. Why he's so possessive of his friends and family.

His tattoo.

He was terrified to lose someone else. Even if that was to another.

I felt bad, because it helped me understand a little more. It opened my eyes a bit wider.

I wondered what else would open my eyes.

What would change my view on him slightly more. What could make me like him even.

The next morning the light beamed through the small crack in the curtains, bouncing off the wood floor.

River had his arms wrapped around me and his head on my chest, laying close beside me with one leg thrown over my legs.

He had continued to hold me the entire night.

I let out a soft sigh, running my fingers through his hair.

He snored softly.

Today worried me, I didn't know what last night had meant for us. Where we stood.

I mean, I knew where I stood.

River woke up a little bit after me, lifting his head from my chest.

"Morning." His voice was husky, full of sleep and made me melt.

Fuckkkking Christ.

"Hi."

He dropped his head back down, somehow pulling me closer to him.

"Are you going back to sleep?"

"No. We aren't getting up yet."

"I am."

"Please," he scoffed. "I am much bigger than you. Good luck moving me."

"You would get off of me if I asked, wouldn't you?"

He lifted his head again. "Obviously. But you don't want to get up yet."

"Do you want to talk more about last night?"

"I suppose that's something we have to do." He gave a small smile before moving off of me and sitting against the pillows and head boards. "I don't want to talk about it a lot."

"No, that's okay. You don't have to at all." I sat up, turning towards him with my legs crossed under me. "Whatever you feel comfortable with."

His eyes softened. "Ivy was my best friend. She was close with Teddy and Emily too. We did everything together. When I lost her, my entire world crumbled. I still don't know what to do."

"I'm so sorry, River." I reached out and squeezed his hand. "I'm sorry you had to watch it."

"It was my fault. It was my idea to go outside and play-" His voice broke and I could hear the tears behind it.

I moved closer before sitting on his lap wiping his tears away. "It was not your fault."

"You don't know everything."