i feel...

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🗓️ 7 april 2024

i am woken up my the soothing feeling of someone's warm fingers delicately caressing my cheek. i was enjoying it until i realised it was ruben.

i opened my eyes and was about to scold him, when i saw him doing the exact same to kiana who was cutely curled up into a ball on his chest.

"i didn't mean to wake you up" he slowly removed his hand from my cheek. "don't you have training today?" i rubbed my eyes. yup i've lived with ruben long enough to memorise his schedule.

"yeah but they changed it to the afternoon" he replied while stroking kianas back with the hand he was just from using to caress my cheek. "why is she laying like that?" i raised my eyebrows.

"i don't know, im guessing that's how she was in the womb" he smiled. "that's so cute" i gushed.

"her or me?" ruben smirked sheepishly. "oh her a hundred percent" i smiled making ruben roll his eyes but it didn't take him long to crack a smile as well. "i missed your smile" he mumbled before turning his gaze back to the baby.

before i could say anything, he changed the topic really quickly. "she has your freckles" he stated proudly "wanna see?" he asked. "no, not right now, she's sleeping and she can barely hold her head up" i told him. "right" he chuckled.

"i'm going to go shower, i'll make breakfast as soon as i'm done" i told him while getting out of the bed. "okay we'll be waiting" he grinned while sitting up and grabbing the tv remote from the nightstand.

i showered and made sure i felt clean and relaxed, then changed into some comfy clothes

i showered and made sure i felt clean and relaxed, then changed into some comfy clothes

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when i went back into the room, i saw kiana was now awake. she was staring up at ruben with her tiny little hand on the side of his face. she was no doubt going to be a daddy's girl.

i'm pretty sure ruben was oblivious to what was happening because he was too focused on the tv show he was watching, but as soon as he noticed me, he immediately turned and smiled.

"don't cook breakfast, i'll go buy some." he stood up and handed me kiana before placing a kiss on my cheek. i enjoyed it for a split second until i realised what he was doing, so i pushed him away.

i looked up into his eyes and all i could see was pain. for a second i swear i heard his heartbreak. i watched as his smile dropped as he took s small step back.

"sorry it was a reflex" he apologised while putting his shoes on. "mkay" i hummed then made my way to kianas cosy room to get her changed.

"i'll see you two soon yeah?" he came close and gave kiana a peck on her head. I wish it was me... WAIT NO I DONT! I hate him.. maybe not hate, I just don't like him at the moment.

"okay bye" I basically shooed him away while getting ready to feed kiana. I looked down at kiana, who was looking up at me as well with her green doe eyes.

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