expect the unexpected ↠ pacey witter

f i v e

"Why don't you kill off Joey, and have I don't know," Jen, our new neighbor, pauses before continuing. She locks eyes with me and then a smile forms on her lips. "Have Claire be a long lost cousin trying to find Joey's character and have her kiss Pacey instead of Joey!" Jen, says slamming her hand on the table like she just solved all the worlds problems.

I feel my cheeks flush at the thought of kissing Pacey. Joey looked between me and Pacey, knowing she isn't opposed to the idea of it meant she doesn't have to kiss him. I take a bite of the French fry on the tray, avoiding looking at Pacey in fear he'll know I wouldn't object to this script change. Deep down I wouldn't mind kissing him if it meant I could get the idea of what his lips would feel like against mine out of my head because I'll finally know. I'll finally know what it's like to be close to him.

       I see Dawson shaking his head out of the corner of my eye. "No, absolutely not. I don't want Pacey kissing my sister, but," he pauses. "You could do it!" Dawson says looking at Jen. I think it's so funny Dawson would rather have Pacey kiss his crush over his own sister. Pacey side eyes me, smirking. He knows I'm thinking the same thing. "No this is perfect! It'll be a huge plot twist, no one will see it coming!" Dawson says.

         "Why don't I get a say in this?" Pacey asks, causing everyone at the table to look at him.

         "Because I'm the director," Dawsons says. "It's my movie and what I say goes."

         "Yeah, but Joey gets out of kissing me by saying she doesn't want too. Funny how that works, huh?" Pacey says eyes leveling Dawsons.

         "What's that supposed to mean?" Dawson asks.

         Thankfully the lunch bell rings signaling the end of this conversation, "saved by the bell." I mumble.

Dawson, Jen, and Joey had already finished eating so they say their goodbyes and leave. I pick up my tray and throw it out. Coming back to see Pacey still waiting at the table. "Mind if I walk you to class?" He asks. I look around dramatically and he joins me, "what are you looking for?" He asks.

      I give him a look, "Dawson. Are you sure he isn't going to bite your head off?" I laugh.

        I chuckles, nodding. "Funny," he says as if it isn't funny. "It's been a few days since we've talked because of your brother. Just wanted to check in, without him hovering."

         "Yeah, he has been stepping in every time you come near me," I realize aloud. "Why is that?"

         He shrugs, he doesn't seem like his usual self right now. He isn't as hyper, he seems defeated. "Not sure," he says. "Let's go before we're late."

He starts walking towards the cafeteria doors, and it takes me a few steps to jog to catch up to him. "Are you okay?" I ask gently.

         He smiles down at me, but it doesn't reach his eyes. "I'm good, how are you?"

        His sarcasm is lacking, "Pacey." I say lightly.

       He knows I can tell something is up with him. So he lets out a long sigh, "Claire I'm alright. Seriously, I just wanted to walk you to class to check in with you, not the other way around."

        "But what if I want to know how you're doing," I say honestly.

        Although me and Pacey haven't ever been close close, I'm not used to not seeing him. Him and Dawson hang out all the time so I practically see him everyday. Since the first day of school Dawson had kept us apart. Every time I'm home, they are out in town, or at the restaurant to visit Joey.

       Dawnson checks in on me everyday, making sure my anxiety is in check but I'm lonely again. When Pacey was noticing me, and kept going out of his way to see me it made me feel important, wanted. Pacey takes up a huge part of my life and it took Dawson keeping him away for me to notice.  Now I'm back to me, my books, and my parents. It isn't fun.

        He looks down at me out of the corner of his eye, "you miss me," he teases.

       "No," I say keeping my chin high and a straight face.

He pokes my side, "you miss me," he says again.

I stop and look at him. "And?" I dare him. It's the truth.

         He falters for a second, shocked by my honesty. He looks ahead and I see his English teacher, Mrs. Jacobs watching our interaction. Her eyes are narrowed slightly, staring right at me.

        Pacey notices and clears his throat, "I'll see you later okay?" He says and then starts heading into the direction of her.

         I frown at his figure disappearing into the crowd. He asked to walk me to class, not the other way around. Mrs. Jacobs smiles as he enters her classroom, and I could be imagining things but I swear she almost smirked at me before she disappeared behind him.

         "Weird," I mumble, and start heading to class.