Elsewhere: Alfheim

Chapter 2: To Be Or Not To Be

As I rest my head on the trunk of the tree, my consciousness leaves my body and enters the tree. I feel the nutrients of the earth travel up from its roots to the trunk, and then the leaves. I feel the light of the sun penetrating the leaves and traveling the opposite way. The journey of the light ends in the earth, stimulating it so the earth can provide nutrients back to the tree. 

This cycle...it's almost like- a feeling of pure bliss runs through the soul. 

The tree is BREATHING. 

With every breath the tree gives and receives, becoming a channel for life. Without trees, we couldn't breathe. We breathe because they do. They taught us. I wonder who taught them this dance, no, this flow of life? The question isn't vocalized as it isn't the vessel that is experiencing this. The question fills the soul, and the soul becomes the question. In order to answer the question. I begin to travel through the trunk, the branches, the leaves, and beyond.

The air that lies beyond the tree is vast and intangible. There is no place it doesn't touch. It may not be seen with physical eyes, but it can definitely be seen with the true eyes. The eyes of the soul. Thinking feels different in soul form. When a question forms in the soul, it begins to be answered by everything. All one needs to do is listen. The wind speaks, the trees speak, and the earth speaks. All is within one, and one is within all. A blissful sensation moves through the soul as I ride the currents of the wind. 

Sylphs and Zephyr's laugh and greet me as a physical being that has stepped into their world. Looking down, I notice trolls and gnomes on the ground, along undines and nymphs in the water.

Is this what life really is? The question permeates through the soul. How is it that life exists on this level yet none of us are even aware? I think back to the fight with Draugr, my encounters with Maxus and Beatrix, and Berkano. Beatrix had said something about me being able to see them now. That must mean that they were aware of me, following me, and probably helping me for a long time. 

What is magic? The working theory in Aesir is that it's something we are responsible for, but this...this is true magic. It is owned by no one.

I hear a familiar giggle as a sylph appears next to me. "Welcome, Odin! We celebrate your first journey into our world!"

I can't but to give a true smile from my soul. "Hello Beatrix, last time you came into my world. It's only fair that I visit yours this time."

"You never really change! You are always welcome among us!" Beatrix giggle continues.

"I never change?" I respond.

"Oh, you haven't gotten there yet. What are you seeking this time?"

"I was initially trying to understand Berkano and what it meant to be a tree."

"Oh, and what did you come to?" Beatrix asks playfully.

I smile again, "Well, I learned that a tree isn't a tree, but it is. I learned that everything is breathing. Everything is life, and life is...beautiful."

"Hmm...and now what? Would you like to go further?" Beatrix's tone becomes serious for the first time.

"This is an amazing experience, and I found answers to questions that I hadn't even asked yet. But what I really want to know still hasn't been answered. If I go further, will I find the answer?"

Beatrix smiles warmly. "You will. Although the answer may not be what you wanted or expected, it will be truth."

"Then I'm ready to know and would like to continue."

"You can feel it, can't you? That something more, the buried knowledge that even though you are now flying with spirits, this isn't the truth. It's the result of the truth that you only need to reach for. What does it mean to reach? How did you reach this place?"

"I let go. I asked the tree a question, and I allowed it to answer instead of trying to force one. It was surrender, brought about by release." The answer comes to me without even needing to think. I just needed to be.

"Exactly, what are you still holding onto that anchors you to this world of spirits. What do you need to let go of to ascend?"

"I've been wondering about Jess, I want to share all of these things with her. I hope she's experiencing this for herself, I want her to experience this with me. However, I've been wondering about myself far longer. But if I let her go, what did our love mean?"

"Why does the tree give life? Why does it receive it, and what would happen if it chose not to release it for others to receive?"

Realization dawns as my soul begins to glow. "It's love. Love is why the tree gives and why it receives. The tree was loved, so the tree loves. To love is to give. Not letting go doesn't prove love. That's only a lack of trust. As if something cannot simply be without being controlled. That's not love. That's possession."

I let go of my hold on Jess. My being is no longer a clenched fist but an open hand that can receive and give life. My soul shatters and becomes one with the wind, the air, the earth, the warmth from the sun. I become the spirit that resides within all things. I become one with everything, ascending into a bright light and then past that into complete darkness.

"WHO ARE YOU?"

A powerful voice speaks, causing my memories from this world and before to flood through my soul.

"I am.." Before I can finish, I start to see other memories of someone that looks like me but isn't me. I see a man in the midst of a sea of chromatic flames. I am in the flames, but he doesn't seem to notice me. I hear the conversation between me and King Joel before Jess and I left Aesir, along with other voices speaking to who they are. The Conductor, The Observer, The Shaman, The Raven, The King, The Magician, The Wizard, The Thunderbird, The Storm and The Traveler in The Storm. The Liberator. 

The man screams in pain as he's burned by the flames. I fear he will be completely burned alive until he suddenly stops screaming. I recognize the change in his body language as surrenders to the flames and smiles.

DO YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE?

"I DO."

"YES, YOU DO. NOW GO AND DO THE WORK."

"I WILL."

The man and flames disappear, leaving me in silence. The voice doesn't speak again. It's most likely still waiting for my answer. I became one with everything, and that led me to a place where I heard someone else hear things from my life and many others. The man never actually said who he was, yet all of this seems so...familiar.

There are no spirits here or anyone to give me a hint or answer. But if that's true, why was I able to see and hear him, and why has no one else come? I look up to see nothing, but I don't feel alone. I don't know where this place is, but it was just a sea of flames, so this certainly isn't nowhere. I smile with the realization that this place is also Elsewhere.

"I AM ALL OF THE THINGS. I AM EVERYTHING AND NOTHING. I AM FREE. I AM ME, I AM YOU. THERE IS NO DIFFERENCE. I AM NO ONE AND EVERYONE. I AM AND I AM NOT. ALL IS FULFILLED WITHIN I. FOR I AM WITHIN IT, AS IT IS WITHIN US."

"WHY?"

"BECAUSE THAT IS WHAT WAS CHOSEN. BECAUSE THERE IS ALWAYS CHOICE. THE CHOICE THAT ONE HAS AS A RESULT OF EXISTENCE."

"AND WHAT IS CHOSEN?"

"LIFE, DEATH, AND EVERYTHING IN BETWEEN. WE ARE, YOU ARE, I AM CHOSEN. LET IT BE AS IT IS, LET IT NOT BE WHAT IT ISN'T."

"AND SO IT IS."