Less shitty half of rick

Sibling bonding

Burt Looked at his watch on an asteroid wearing suit protected by a force field. "What in the Pigs—" Before he finished two Gromflomite ships landed next him "Galactic Federation! So how much did you come with?" They showed the billions of Blemflarck "Good, four billion as we agreed." He took the case and shoved the box toward them and they opened to see a frozen fart. Gromflomites mouth things rubbed against each other.

Next day burt was buying gold, lots of it, because he didn't trust space money. One moment you can live like a king, the next you're in a barrel wiping your eyes with worthless money paper, weirdest vacation of the century!

He the value of gold plummeted. "What the f*ck? How the f*ck did the value fall that fast?!" Three eyes alien with a tentacle mouth shrugged, only getting four bares for a billion.

He got back on earth, he was in the attic getting high and preparing his weapons. He went down to ricks room to ask for portal gun and then saw the card. "Micheal huh? Cheap two." He called him.

"Krombopulos Michael! Payed killer, you can pay with your planets currency I just, love killing!" Burt smiled.

"Good, I need you to kill a gaseous life form, you need a antimatter gun and it is kept in a federation research lab, I don't have the location but," He sent the money. "A billion should be enough." He made weird aroused noises, with his mouth. "I sent it's last known location and don't lead them back to me." He came down to see Beth and Jerry making out.

Rick looked at burt. "Hey, Burt you missed the existential shit show." He VR looking goggles and turned a few times and sat on the arm chair. "What are you doing?" He asked worried at He had something in common with Beth.

"Watching ball fondlers." He said seeing a different version of himself watching tv. Rick pulled it off and switched the channel. "Oh yea, baby! better then that cat fishing show." They look at him. "It was literal, I watched it while i got into fly finishing and then Jerry ruined it." They watched ball folders, while Beth and Jerry climbed the stares to their room.

Burt was at the school grading papers and counting the days to burn this place. He came home walked to the garage and found rick scanning tacky brass microscope having converted a camera and the head of a few rays guns into a scanner. "Dad, please tell me you aren't going to war because some nitwit sold you a fake 19th century," he said getting a closer look, one scan from his watch confirmed it. "made in 2011, it has a odd radiation Though?" He asked and saw rick had taken his laptop.

Morty came int the garage. "Hey, Morty, lemme ask you a question real quick. Does evil exist, and if so, can one detect and measure it?" Rick asked wait for him to not have an answer.

Morty Scratched the back of his head not having an answer. "Um..." Burt gave him the answer by nodding.

Rick didn't let finish. "Rhetorical question Morty. The answer is yes, you just have to be a genius." The machine scans the microscope. A bar on the laptop marked "IQ" drops to close to 0. "Your sister's boss gave me a microscope that would have made me retarded." Burt looked at the scans and saw it would have turned him into a vegetable.

"Ooh, oh boy Rick, I don't think you're allowed to say that word, you know?"

Rick defended himself. "Uh, Morty, I'm not disparaging the differently abled. I'm stating the fact that if I had used this microscope, it would have made me mentally retarded."

"Okay, yeah, but I don't think it's about logic, Rick. I think the word's just become a symbolic issue for powerful groups that feel like they're doing the right thing."

Rick just looked annoyed"Well that's retarded." Jerry lifts up the garage door.

He looked angry "What are you guys talking about?