Love Letters To You

Forests

I know my colors aren't bright, 
they're covered in muddy greens,
muddy browns, 
and dark shadows of black.
I was scared to show my colors, 
I hid them under layers and layers of trees... 
Layers of leaves... 
Hidden under leafy plants.

I hid myself, 
I was scared that if people saw my true colors they wouldn't like me, 
I was scared YOU wouldn't like me.
I hid the dark colors,
Until you could tell something was wrong... 

My emotions were eating me from the inside.
I couldn't hold them in anymore, 
It was getting bad, 

And I was scared to lose you. 
I was terrified that if you knew I wasn't the sharpest crayon in the box,
If you knew that I wasn't a flawless painting,
If you knew that I wasn't a perfect sphere,
I was so scared,
That you'd see what lies beneath the leaves,
And you'd leave.
I was scared if you saw my true colors you would change your mind.

However,
You got me to trust you,
You reassured me,
You promised it would be okay.
I believed you.
I listened. 
I told you about the mud at the bottom of the beautiful forests,
The mud at the bottom of the canopies of leaves.

You didn't understand it all, 
But you listened. 
It didn't scare you away.

You were happy to see my true colors,
The earthy tones of the forest,
You saw the dirty colors, 
You saw the mud. 
You were happy to see my flaws. 
My imperfections.
You were glad I wasn't a perfect painting,

Because neither were you. 
It made you feel not alone. 
You told me your struggles, 
With the same fear I had. 
The fear that I'd leave.

However, 
Even though,
Forests are dark, 
Sometimes scary, 
They have so much life beneath the canopy. 
They have gorgeous trees, 
Animals that seem mythical. 
They are beautiful.
They have life. 
And so did we.

 
It's important to remember, 
It is always the darkest before the dawn.
And he saw that.
He saw my potential.
He saw the pretty sunset at the end of the dark.
He believed in me.

You found me at a point in my life when I was at my lowest. I showed you the worst parts of me. I showed you why I dislike myself. I showed you my pain. And I was so scared too, I was so scared to show you. But you saw it... and it made you fall harder. You still loved me anyway. And I've never had that before. You've shown me true care. And for that, I thank you.