Unholy | Noah Sebastian

|Chapter Twenty-Three|

I didn't know who destroyed Briar's apartment, but I had a few guesses.  None of them were good.  If it was Lilith, that posed a threat to Briar's life.  If it was a lower demon, well that wasn't good but nothing I couldn't manage.  If it was the archangels, it posed a threat to my brother's life.

It could have been any of them, and I didn't know which one it was.  Either way, I wasn't leaving Briar's side.  I wasn't going to threaten Lilith and I wasn't going to check in with Michael.  Hopefully Michael would send some angels to send Lilith back to the Abyss where she belongs.

It broke me watching Briar try to keep her emotions in check, I knew she was scared - I could taste it on my tongue.  I should be able to hear her thoughts, but something was blocking me.  I couldn't hear her, couldn't feel her. I wish I knew what this meant, was it the demon magic keeping me from hearing her.  Was it something worse?  Was it my feelings for her?  I had a mountain of questions and no answers and no leads to follow. 

I've never felt more worthless in my existence.

"What do you think the chances are that this was a random break-in," she whispers, looking at the carnage.  The heavy dining table is split down the middle, splinters of wood litter the ground like confetti.  The cushions on the couch have been sliced and stuffing is strewn across the floor, red smears on the walls appear to be blood that hasn't dried yet.  The dishes in the kitchen are shattered on the floor, some of the cabinet doors are hanging from the hinges, some are on the floor with the dishes.

I pull her into my chest, but she pushes me away.  Instead she gets out a trash bag and starts cleaning the wreckage.  I take the bag from her, "go take a bath, angel, I'll clean this up."

"No, I have to do something," she reiterates and I have no idea what she means.  She has to clean the mess?  She has to do something stupid?  What is going on inside of her head?

"Hey, talk to me," I coax gently.  She's still insisting on cleaning, she doesn't look up from her work and she doesn't reply.  I snap my fingers and her broken home is put back together.  Every broken dish, all the cushions, the large wooden table.  She huffs as she throws the bag she was holding on the floor.

"This is so fucked, Noah. I can't even go a single day without someone coming for me. What kind of life is this? I was living more before you dumped this on me! You need to call Michael here, I'm going to make this stupid fucking sacrifice right now, before someone takes the choice from me. Get him here now, Noah, before we can't save you and your brother. Because I don't want to live this life anymore."

I don't feel an ounce of sadness from her. There's determination, indignation. Fear is buried under those, but it's not driving her words.

"I told you I was going to take care of this, and I meant it. Michael is going to eliminate Lilith. And you? Well, you aren't making any sacrifices. I will find another way to save my brother, but I'm not going to trade your life for his. I-," I stop myself, not because I don't love her, but because love isn't enough for what I feel for her. "I have lived a thousand lives, known a thousand souls and none of them have ever felt like home. I don't belong to anyone else."

"You can't mean that," she whispers. Her old insecurities bubbling to the surface, her delusion that she's not worthy of love because no one has ever loved her without condition.

"I've never meant anything more," I cross the floor to her and pull her into my arms. She doesn't fight this time and sags against me. I grasp her chin and force her to look up at me, her eyes flutter close as I press my lips to hers. I move my mouth over hers, one hand pressing into the space where I know the dimples are on her lower back, the other hand splays across her throat - her pulse jumping under my touch. Her hair smells like eucalyptus and her hands are gripping my hips. "I'm going to protect you, angel, it's all that matters to me. If you don't believe anything else, believe that."