Empty me, Fill me up

Monday

An old man passed by me today and asked what day it was
and it was silly,
because I didn't know either.
Thursday,I said,
but then realized I only have two scars on my left hand.
How was I this tired so soon?
How can we be this tired at this age?
People smile at me saying I'm too young to understand
but I've lived a thousand lives
I've lost people
and I've seen people die
I've walked this earth
and crossed these skies
I've seen pain
and I've held it in my mind
but nothing I gained
will ever be mine,
Because pain does not give
not even for a prize
neither your bleeding heart
or your stupid mind
and pain has friends
they visit quite soon
every now and then
they come crawling to my room.
Fear grips my hair
while grief leaves scars on my face meanwhile the others hold my hands
as if it was all just a game
But this game will last
till one of us win
and I fight everyday
trying to keep it all in
And every bite is a win
even a simple smile
for I cannot win-
but I can hold on for a while