Who killed Wanda Day? (DAY! Series Book 1)

Chapter Twentythree - An incel, a bouquet, and something unpredictable

Karl Schuhmann, a product of Braunschweig's finest vintage, was born in June 1985. Unfortunately, his father had already kicked the bucket before Karl could even take his first breath. But fear not, for Karl's mother, Helga, was a force to be reckoned with. She was a young, strong woman who took it upon herself to raise her little bundle of joy. Helga was so protective that even the slightest scratch was treated with enough iodine and disinfectant to sterilize a hospital. Karl's bandages were so professionally done that he could have moonlighted as a mummy.

Karl may have had an old-fashioned name, but it wasn't that which made him the laughingstock of the playground. No, it was the fact that his mother was more glued to him than a toddler to their favorite blanket. Even at the ripe old age of five, Karl wasn't allowed to go on the slide alone. Helga was so terrified that he might hurt himself that she hovered over him like a helicopter parent on steroids.

Unfortunately for him, his troubles didn't end on the playground. When he started school, his mother's overprotective tendencies only seemed to get worse. Every morning, Helga would give her son a big goodbye kiss on the mouth, even when Karl was already 12 years old. He begged and pleaded with her to let him walk the 200 feet to school alone, or at the very least, to spare him the embarrassment of a public smooch. But Helga was relentless.

When he hit puberty at the age of fifteen years, three months, and four days, he found himself in a bit of a sticky situation. His hormones were raging, his thoughts were consumed with girls, and his mother...well, let's just say she was a bit too present for comfort. With no private space to call his own, Karl was forced to get creative. The only place he could find solitude was the cemetery, where his mother hadn't been since his father's death. Karl discovered his sexuality among the trees, but out of respect for the dead, he made sure to keep his back turned to the graves.

At the age of 18, he graduated from school with flying colors and set his sights on studying archaeology at university. It was a passion he had nurtured since childhood, and he was determined to pursue it. Unfortunately, his mother had other plans. She begged and pleaded with him not to leave her, but he was more than ready to spread his wings and fly. He moved to another city to begin his studies, but making friends proved to be a bit of a challenge. Perhaps it was because he spent four hours on the phone with his mother every evening.

After finishing his studies, Karl found himself struggling to find a job. Without a steady income, he had no choice but to move back in with his mother, who welcomed him back with open arms. However, he soon realized that privacy was still a luxury he couldn't afford. His mother had a habit of bursting into his room unannounced, even though he was now twenty-six years old. Frustrated and fed up, Karl threatened to move out. But his mother, being the typical narcissist that she was, cried and howled until he backed down. After all, he still had the cemetery...

At the age of thirty, he found himself still alone, but at least he had a job at a tax office. From morning until night, he typed away at his computer, dreaming of a life on a South Sea island with a beautiful woman. She would have dark skin, wide hips, and...well, let's just say Karl had a thing for ample bosoms.

His fantasies remained just that - fantasies - until one fateful day when his work colleague convinced him to download a dating app. Lo and behold, Karl found the woman of his dreams. They chatted and chatted, and after a few days, he mustered up the courage to ask her out. To his surprise, she agreed. Karl couldn't believe his luck. But when she showed up for their date, he realized that she may have been a bit... creative... with her profile pictures. Let's just say that she looked a little different in person. But he was a gentleman, and he decided to stick it out, after all she was a real, breathing woman and on a date with him.

She invited him over to her place. Nervously, he sat next to her on the couch, wondering what was about to happen. To his surprise, she took off her blouse and leaned in for a kiss. But Karl, being the inexperienced guy that he was, didn't quite know what to do. The young woman burst out laughing and told him that he was the worst kisser she had ever encountered.